Bad pick up lines for cyclists

[Quixote]

CYCLING RELATED PICK UP LINES THAT WON'T HELP YOU GET A DATE:

1. Would you like to come to my place and see the shower I urinate in.
2. You think my thighs are big...you should see my...!
3. You smell as fresh as a brand new can of bag balm.
4. Wanna go spin for a couple hours?
5. Would you date a cyclist or should I just start stalking you?
6. Can I photograph you for the Babes on Bikes thread.
7. How'd ya like to swap saddle sore pics?
8. Wanna see the cyclingnews post that got me banned?

 

[ElChingon]

9. Sounds like your bottom bracket could use some lube.
10. Wow, your bottom bracket is huge!
11. Is it me or is your bottom bracket super tight?
12. Looks like your bottom bracket could be torqued a bit.
13. Wanna make your bottom bracket feel like its spinning on butter?
14. I can get that squeak/noises out of your bottom bracket any day.
15. Anyone ever ream your bottom bracket?
16. I'm really into big bottom brackets.
17. Look I can make your bottom bracket spin like buttagh!
18. Wow, that's a big head set!
19. Looks like those cups can hold a lot of bearings.
20. So, what size cups do you use on your headset?
21. Are those oversized hubs?
22. I'd like to void the warranty on that bike.
23. Ever over grease your bottom bracket/headset/hubs?
24. Are those hubs rebuilt?
25. I know they say ride it don't hump it, but for you I'll make an exception.
26. Wanna spin my axel?

 

[ramjambunath]

27 I'm available for a ride, I've got protection (pointing to helmet)
28 I'd like you to ride me with your saddle.
29 It's not just my legs that have super oscillations.

 

[Quixote]

10. Wow, your bottom bracket is huge!

From experience I can testify that comments about bottom bracket size are relationship busters. As a rule of thumbs, it's always a good policy to avoid answering your wife or girlfriend when they ask, "Honey, do you think my bottom bracket is getting too big?"

 

[Quixote]

30. How'd you like to come to my place and meet the sock puppet who does all the thinking for me?

 

[boomcie]

31. I'm like a bike without the wheels the frame and the saddle, but with the penis. Nuff said.

32. I'm like a penis without the wheels the frame and the saddle. Damn it, that does not make sense. Intercourse much?

33. I've accidentally crapped my pants on a long training ride. I'll have to get undressed right here, right now. Whoops, eeerectioooooon.

 

[Michielveedeebee]

31. I'm like a bike without the wheels the frame and the saddle, but with the penis. Nuff said.

32. I'm like a penis without the wheels the frame and the saddle. Damn it, that does not make sense. Intercourse much?

33. I've accidentally crapped my pants on a long training ride. I'll have to get undressed right here, right now. Whoops, eeerectioooooon.

Boomcie! You're back

34. Want to compare how smooth our legs are?

Weirdly enough that one worked once

 

[RedheadDane]

6. Can I photograph you for the Babes on Bikes thread.

Oh! I'd totally let you photograph me for the BoB thread!













Fully dressed!

Got a little disappointed there, didn't ya?

 

[Havetts]

Got a little disappointed there, didn't ya?

Nope, deliver.

 

[ElChingon]

Oh! I'd totally let you photograph me for the BoB thread!

Fully dressed!

Got a little disappointed there, didn't ya?

Break out the web cam, I'll get the wardrobe list ready

 

[Quixote]

Oh! I'd totally let you photograph me for the BoB thread!












Fully dressed!

Got a little disappointed there, didn't ya?

CLEAR..........THUMP
CLEAR...................THUMP
CLEAR............................THUMP
Okay...got the ticker going again. A "little disappointed" is putting it mildly.

 

[Oldman]

.35 Frank says shorter cranks work better and improve position. Can I show you?

 

[Zam_Olyas]

.35 Frank says shorter cranks work better and improve position. Can I show you?

we have a winner