Let's hope he doesn't steal the victory on the Tourmalet away from the real strongmen in this Tour.
in the leading group 4km from the top of the climb, lance puts in a blistering attack. in seconds, he has a 10 meter gap. shocking as it may be, any *real* cycling fan, any student of the tactical geeeeeeeeeenious that is johan, knows that time "deliberately" lost = big energy saved. armstrong is simply cashing in his energy saved chips.
there is NO reaction from the heads of state. contador, gesink, schleck, samu, menchov...all seem to be going backwards in the wake of armstrong's vicious acceleration. all are looking at each other. it is screamingly obvious from the looks on their faces that to a man, they are thinking "wtf???"
the best rider EVER in the entire universe slows his pace, allowing the elite group to ride up to him. armstrong slides to the back of this group in order to discreetly scratch his ball and tweet "tourmaulet, schmourmalet. just testing. real attack yet to come!"
dancing on his pedals with 3km to go, lance goes again. one by one, he passes contador, schleck, menchov, samu, gesink...placing "race against cancer" cards in the back pockets of their jerseys as he rides by.
the most tested athlete in the world is now leading the pack. pigs are flying and their is world peace as armstrong goes again. the podium pretenders react, though weakly. the massive crowd is screaming!!!
no use typing *what* the crowd is screaming as it would all appear as a series of "*****'s"
lance is not done yet...reaching into his bag of courage, he pulls out...the look.
he sees andy crying for frank. contador is yelling "i have much to learn!
the psychological damage inflicted by the look cause menchov, samu, and gesink to abandon on the spot.
satisfied that he is again the most feared rider iin the history of cycling, armstrong begins his sprint to victory atop the tormoulet....or so he thought.
failing to notice antler man running by his side, he veers a centimeter too close, hooking his right break lever on antlerman's yellow wristband.
armstrong crashes!!! it is a BIG crash because with it, lance has broken the record for most crashes in a tdf without abandoning.
he is up immediately. tragically, pieces of antlers wedged in his pedals make it impossible to clip in. as contador and schleck fly by, he knows his dream of a stage victory is over.
at 2km, alberto fires the afterburners. andy, still recovering from "the look," has nothing left in the legs. he loses over a minute in the final 2k.
back down the slope, all is not lost for armstrong. knowing there i no "i" in team, he waits 10 minutes levi in order to pace him to the finish.