Eurosport commentary

[therealthing]

Bardet "smells blood and he likes the taste of rabbit"

What???

 

[StephenC2020]

Kirby having a britgasm

 

[Cycle Chic]

Kirby pronouncing Aoste as Asstay.....unbelieveable - fancy not even knowing how to pronounce a stage start name.

 

[movingtarget]

Had to laugh when Kirby complained that cameras were concentrated on Bardet instead of the two British riders at the front of the race because of Brexit !

 

[Red Rick]

The Dauphine is when I rejoice that Sporza is showing cycling again

 

[Armchair cyclist]

I am sure I heard Kirby say yesterday, as Aru, Porte and others made a series of attacks, that Contador, "had nothing left to inject himself."

In context, I think he meant that he had insufficient energy left to contribute to the increase in pace, and so could only follow wheels. Or maybe not.

 

[lemon cheese cake]

In the London Nocturne Kirby was obsessed with Ed Clancy (until he crashed), a rider without a pro contract (George Wood), and the two Raleigh riders Sebatian Mora and Adria Moreno.

 

[movingtarget]

Amateurish by Kirby to keep getting the time gaps incorrect when Porte was chasing. He kept calling the gap from Froome to Porte when it was from Fuglsang to Porte. Froome wasn't leading the race..............at least he had an offsider to correct him !

 

[the delgados]

Re:

Bardet "smells blood and he likes the taste of rabbit"

What???

Sigh.
Aesop's Fables. That's what.

Also, kudos to the previous poster who picked up on the Brexit quip. It was funny!

Geez, don't make me keep coming back here to explain the brilliance of my man Carlton Kirby, m'kay?

 

[RedheadDane]

You know what? It seems you're essentially the Kirby to Kirby's Si Clarke.

 

[the delgados]

Re:

You know what? It seems you're essentially the Kirby to Kirby's Si Clarke.

Ha! Good one!
I'm not going to apologize for exposing the philistines among us.
My man Carlton Kirby takes a thorough beating round these parts, a lot of which is unwarranted.
Sure, the guy makes mistakes, but who can blame anyone for, say, not recognizing a rider in a huge pile-up?
I'd be concerned if my man Carlton Kirby was calling a race and said something like, "Oh golly, a crash! A huge crash and I think Greg LeMond is on the ground! Oh, Sean, do you think this will hurt LeMond's chances of winning the 2017 Tour? Sean?"
That would be cause for concern.
Otherwise the mistakes pointed out here aren't a big deal. give the guy a break, for gawdsake. I mean, he's like 112 years old.
Enjoy the man. Enjoy the legend.
Enjoy the raconteur.
Enjoy Carlton Kirby.

 

[Alberto Fishwick]

Completely bamboozled by Tour de Suisse coverage in the UK. I can understand that there was a lot of live action to fit it at the weekend but yesterday they re-ran some motor bike stuff from a while back and today they are re-showing yesterday's stage. Meanwhile, the live coverage is only on the Player and, although Quigley and Smith are actually on-site for once, there is no commentary. Bizarre or what?

 

[Cycle Chic]

Re: Re:

You know what? It seems you're essentially the Kirby to Kirby's Si Clarke.

Ha! Good one!
I'm not going to apologize for exposing the philistines among us.
My man Carlton Kirby takes a thorough beating round these parts, a lot of which is unwarranted.
Sure, the guy makes mistakes, but who can blame anyone for, say, not recognizing a rider in a huge pile-up?
I'd be concerned if my man Carlton Kirby was calling a race and said something like, "Oh golly, a crash! A huge crash and I think Greg LeMond is on the ground! Oh, Sean, do you think this will hurt LeMond's chances of winning the 2017 Tour? Sean?"
That would be cause for concern.
Otherwise the mistakes pointed out here aren't a big deal. give the guy a break, for gawdsake. I mean, he's like 112 years old.
Enjoy the man. Enjoy the legend.
Enjoy the raconteur.
Enjoy Carlton Kirby.

So Kirby is now coming here to justify his pathetic commentary - keep reading Carlton, you,re on borrowed Eurosport time schedule.

 

[RedheadDane]

Hey, Cycle Chic - and others - maybe you can tell me if I'm right in this assumption.
It seems your issue with Kirby is not so much that he makes the occasional mistake; everybody does that every-now-and-then, but rather that he:

1: Refuses to accept it when people correct his mistakes.

B: Constantly hypes certain riders; "Si Clarke for MSR" for example.

 

[tobydawq]

Re:

Hey, Cycle Chic - and others - maybe you can tell me if I'm right in this assumption.
It seems your issue with Kirby is not so much that he makes the occasional mistake; everybody does that every-now-and-then, but rather that he:

1: Refuses to accept it when people correct his mistakes.

B: Constantly hypes certain riders; "Si Clarke for MSR" for example.

Now I'm sad that you didn't include a third option, denoted by Roman Numerals or something else

 

[StephenC2020]

Re:

Hey, Cycle Chic - and others - maybe you can tell me if I'm right in this assumption.
It seems your issue with Kirby is not so much that he makes the occasional mistake; everybody does that every-now-and-then, but rather that he:

1: Refuses to accept it when people correct his mistakes.

B: Constantly hypes certain riders; "Si Clarke for MSR" for example.

Of course everyone makes mistakes, I have no problem with a commentator misidentifying the odd rider and so on. I would add to options 1 and B that

III: He is completely and utterly clueless when it comes to basic race tactics and understanding which riders have a chance given a particular route.

and

IV - He continuously misunderstands the time gaps and other graphics on screen, often forgetting there is a break in front and assuming that the gap to a particular group is from wherever Froome is.

I really do think he is the worst sporting commentator I have ever come across and I like many would rather watch in silence or in a language I don't understand than to his drivel.

 

[Tour_de_Calvados]

According to Kirby's recent Dauphiné commentary he has now been informed that Clarke doesn't like to be referred to as "Si" so he spent hours going on about that...

At least we didn't have to sit through endless Reichenbach hype in the Giro

 

[the delgados]

Re: Re:

Hey, Cycle Chic - and others - maybe you can tell me if I'm right in this assumption.
It seems your issue with Kirby is not so much that he makes the occasional mistake; everybody does that every-now-and-then, but rather that he:

1: Refuses to accept it when people correct his mistakes.

B: Constantly hypes certain riders; "Si Clarke for MSR" for example.

Of course everyone makes mistakes, I have no problem with a commentator misidentifying the odd rider and so on. I would add to options 1 and B that

III: He is completely and utterly clueless when it comes to basic race tactics and understanding which riders have a chance given a particular route.

and

IV - He continuously misunderstands the time gaps and other graphics on screen, often forgetting there is a break in front and assuming that the gap to a particular group is from wherever Froome is.

I really do think he is the worst sporting commentator I have ever come across and I like many would rather watch in silence or in a language I don't understand than to his drivel.

You know, I've been paying a lot more attention to analyzing my man Carlton Kirby's in-race description of race tactics since the braying hounds descended on this thread, and I honestly think it's totally unfair to say he's "clueless." That is a classic example of the unfair hyperbolic responses that need to be examined a bit further before throwing him to the forum wolves.
Granted, he sometimes gets a bit excited when some rando takes a flyer 50 km's from the finish and ponders the possibility of victory, but can we just chalk it up to excitement and let the former pros take over?
I mean, it's not the Cuban Missile Crisis we're talking about here.
No need to rush to the keyboards to send a bunch of vitriol CK's way.
He is far from "clueless."

I agree that it can be a bit annoying when he misunderstands time gaps; but to be fair, it happens often, regardless of who is calling the race.

Aside from some here who harbour an almost pathological hatred toward the guy, i know this thread is mostly done in fun. Everyone has their own tastes and that's cool.
But don't make me come back here to pick apart the inaccuracies and make fun of those who don't understand the use of metaphors. Deal?

 

[RedheadDane]

What about the arguments that he (maybe?) refuses to accept when people correct his mistakes (1), and randomly hype riders (B)?

B: To return to the Simon Clarke for MSR example: What reason could there possibly be to constantly claim that he could win, when his best result has been - what? 100th... Even if he'd finished in the top-20 once it wouldn't make him a favourite.
So, basically, I can see why people gets a little annoyed by hearing that same old song every year, when it's clearly not true.

1: About the refusing to accept it when people correct him: Why? It's one thing to make an honest mistake, but then you should accept that you made a mistake and move on.

And to StephenC2010's point:

IV: Not understanding time gaps is pretty bad. That would be like a football commentator not understanding the goal score...

 

[tobydawq]

Re:

What about the arguments that he (maybe?) refuses to accept when people correct his mistakes (1), and randomly hype riders (B)?

B: To return to the Simon Clarke for MSR example: What reason could there possibly be to constantly claim that he could win, when his best result has been - what? 100th... Even if he'd finished in the top-20 once it wouldn't make him a favourite.
So, basically, I can see why people gets a little annoyed by hearing that same old song every year, when it's clearly not true.

1: About the refusing to accept it when people correct him: Why? It's one thing to make an honest mistake, but then you should accept that you made a mistake and move on.

And to StephenC2010's point:

IV: Not understanding time gaps is pretty bad. That would be like a football commentator not understanding the goal score...

Regarding IV (which should probably be called δ, for consistency), that is something a lot of commentators are struggling with. I don't understand how it can be so difficult, nonetheless. Each time a group is shown, a little number is shown on the sign, presenting the group. That number corresponds to the number at the top of the screen, where time gaps are shown, and the jerseys up there also help paint the picture. And all time gaps are always from the front of the race to a particular group. How can that be so difficult to comprehend?

 

[StephenC2020]

Re: Re:

What about the arguments that he (maybe?) refuses to accept when people correct his mistakes (1), and randomly hype riders (B)?

B: To return to the Simon Clarke for MSR example: What reason could there possibly be to constantly claim that he could win, when his best result has been - what? 100th... Even if he'd finished in the top-20 once it wouldn't make him a favourite.
So, basically, I can see why people gets a little annoyed by hearing that same old song every year, when it's clearly not true.

1: About the refusing to accept it when people correct him: Why? It's one thing to make an honest mistake, but then you should accept that you made a mistake and move on.

And to StephenC2010's point:

IV: Not understanding time gaps is pretty bad. That would be like a football commentator not understanding the goal score...

Regarding IV (which should probably be called δ, for consistency), that is something a lot of commentators are struggling with. I don't understand how it can be so difficult, nonetheless. Each time a group is shown, a little number is shown on the sign, presenting the group. That number corresponds to the number at the top of the screen, where time gaps are shown, and the jerseys up there also help paint the picture. And all time gaps are always from the front of the race to a particular group. How can that be so difficult to comprehend?

I actually wanted call it δ but was too lazy to go and find the keyboard shortcut

And yeah in fairness to Kirby he is far from the only commentator to have problems with time gaps.

In response to the delgados - I really think my points are fair. I wish the man no ill will whatsoever, I hope he has wonderful and fulfilling life. I would just prefer if he were doing something other than commentating on my favourite sport.

 

[cantpedal]

Re: Re:

What about the arguments that he (maybe?) refuses to accept when people correct his mistakes (1), and randomly hype riders (B)?

B: To return to the Simon Clarke for MSR example: What reason could there possibly be to constantly claim that he could win, when his best result has been - what? 100th... Even if he'd finished in the top-20 once it wouldn't make him a favourite.
So, basically, I can see why people gets a little annoyed by hearing that same old song every year, when it's clearly not true.

1: About the refusing to accept it when people correct him: Why? It's one thing to make an honest mistake, but then you should accept that you made a mistake and move on.

And to StephenC2010's point:

IV: Not understanding time gaps is pretty bad. That would be like a football commentator not understanding the goal score...

Regarding IV (which should probably be called δ, for consistency), that is something a lot of commentators are struggling with. I don't understand how it can be so difficult, nonetheless. Each time a group is shown, a little number is shown on the sign, presenting the group. That number corresponds to the number at the top of the screen, where time gaps are shown, and the jerseys up there also help paint the picture. And all time gaps are always from the front of the race to a particular group. How can that be so difficult to comprehend?

I actually wanted call it δ but was too lazy to go and find the keyboard shortcut

And yeah in fairness to Kirby he is far from the only commentator to have problems with time gaps.

In response to the delgados - I really think my points are fair. I wish the man no ill will whatsoever, I hope he has wonderful and fulfilling life. I would just prefer if he were doing something other than commentating on my favourite sport.

to be fair a large percentage of the posters in race threads here confuse the posted time gaps.

 

[the delgados]

Re:

What about the arguments that he (maybe?) refuses to accept when people correct his mistakes (1), and randomly hype riders (B)?

B: To return to the Simon Clarke for MSR example: What reason could there possibly be to constantly claim that he could win, when his best result has been - what? 100th... Even if he'd finished in the top-20 once it wouldn't make him a favourite.
So, basically, I can see why people gets a little annoyed by hearing that same old song every year, when it's clearly not true.

1: About the refusing to accept it when people correct him: Why? It's one thing to make an honest mistake, but then you should accept that you made a mistake and move on.

And to StephenC2010's point:

IV: Not understanding time gaps is pretty bad. That would be like a football commentator not understanding the goal score...

re Simon Clarke: I don't know! Maybe he placed a few Euros-- or pounds or whatever the hell currency the Brits use nowadays--on the guy and is willing him to win. Maybe Clarke sidled up to the Kirbster before the race and whispered a few nothings in his ear about having great legs. Who knows?!
Just sit back with some bon bons and enjoy, my friend.

re Refusing to accept: Honestly, I have no clue what you're talking about. These days Kirby apologizes for stepping on his own shadow. Seriously, it seems he's developed post-traumatic-stress disorder after reading the constant abuse he receives. Poor guy needs to lighten up a little and realize he's a gawddamn legend.

 

[the delgados]

Oh, I almost forgot. To all those who say they'd rather watch the race on mute or in a foreign language than listen to Kirby, I'm calling BS.
That nonsense reminds me of when baseball purists say it's better to listen to a game on the radio rather than on tv.
Baloney.
Who in their right mind would rather turn on a radio when they have a 50" HD TV staring them in the face? No one!
Seriously, I dare anyone to watch the closing km's of a bunch gallop on mute without feeling the urge to hear Kirby go crazy. You'd be missing out on a lot of the fun.
Go ahead! I dare you.
I've had enough of this anti-Kirby hysteria, so I hereby sentence you all to two years of watching those clowns call a race over on MSNBC.

 

[RedheadDane]

re Simon Clarke: I don't know! Maybe he placed a few Euros-- or pounds or whatever the hell currency the Brits use nowadays--on the guy and is willing him to win. Maybe Clarke sidled up to the Kirbster before the race and whispered a few nothings in his ear about having great legs. Who knows?!
Just sit back with some bon bons and enjoy, my friend.

Every single year? Kirby must really have too much money if he keeps betting on a guy with no chance to win. And I don't think Clarke would continue trying to trick Kirby into thinking he has great legs...
(I'm just looking forward to the year Clarke doesn't ride, and he still gets Kirby-hyped...)

re Refusing to accept: Honestly, I have no clue what you're talking about. These days Kirby apologizes for stepping on his own shadow. Seriously, it seems he's developed post-traumatic-stress disorder after reading the constant abuse he receives. Poor guy needs to lighten up a little and realize he's a gawddamn legend.

Again, I'm simply referring to (multiple) posts I've seen around here.

Oh, I almost forgot. To all those who say they'd rather watch the race on mute or in a foreign language than listen to Kirby, I'm calling BS.

Technically, for me listening to Kirby would be listening in a foreign language. Which I don't really mind, I've listened to Dutch commentating...