Time for an aussie team

[karlboss]

So you win a stage in the previous edition, you win a stage of the giro one month before the start, and your team can't find a place for you. What do you do? You lobby for an australian team. As a nation we are ranked 3rd in the road rankings despite having so few riders competing, so its obvious we have the talent.

Now I know its money and there isn't domestic commercial support, so I have 2 questions
1. Who should be naming sponsor for an all conquering aussie team? (well at least 2nd)
2. Who would you pick for an aussie tour team? (include reasons)

So off the top of my head

GC: Evans, Rogers
Sprints: McEwen
Leadouts: Renshaw
Domestiques: Lancaster, Hansen, Lloyd, Gerrans, O'grady

Sponsors
Naming: Fosters beer group
Bikes: Teschner

Thoughts?

 

[auscyclefan94]

1. The company should be Qantas because they can fly them everywhere. Qantas is an Australian iconic brand. It has a symbol of a kangaroo which is also iconic Australia!
2. The team for Team Qantas should be for the sprints as we are more suited to them:

Mcewan -Director Sportif
Renshaw
Hansen
Davis
Lancaster
Brown
Gerrans
Meyer
Bobridge
Haussler

That would be a pretty awesome outfit for a sprint team and would be tough to beat. The bike brand could be Malvern Star. That would be really original!!!

 

[BroDeal]

Team name: Crikey
Sponsor: Outback Steakhouse
Director Sportif. Paul Hogan
Podium Girl: Nicole Kidman
Team spokeman: Kirk Lazarus
Team car: Subaru Outback
Official recovery drink: Fosters beer
Motivational tool: Anyone who fails to win is strapped to a chair and forced to watch the movie Australia.

 

[whiteboytrash]

Naming: Fosters beer group
Thoughts?

Yep the Belgium’s are yearning for an under strength beer which taste like cats phiss. No chance.

 

[Marmot]

Team name: Crikey
Sponsor: Outback Steakhouse
Director Sportif. Paul Hogan
Podium Girl: Nicole Kidman
Team spokeman: Kirk Lazarus
Team car: Subaru Outback
Official recovery drink: Fosters beer
Motivational tool: Anyone who fails to win is strapped to a chair and forced to watch the movie Australia.

That's gold.

 

[flyor64]

Motivational tool: Anyone who fails to win is strapped to a chair and forced to watch the movie Australia.

Was it really that bad? My wife wants me to watch it with her..

 

[karlboss]

gold dust bro. Especially the punishment.

Fosters is a golden joke to all australians, and I shan't defend it. However I can't think of an australian product sold more widely overseas, even if it is an embarassment.

 

[msjett]

Nicole Kidman would put anyone to sleep, btw, Outback Steak House is owned by an American company....

 

[Hotbrakes]

Director Sportif. Paul Hogan LOL

"That's not a bike............that's a bike".

 

[Bala Verde]

gold dust bro. Especially the punishment.

Fosters is a golden joke to all australians, and I shan't defend it. However I can't think of an australian product sold more widely overseas, even if it is an embarassment.

Same with Heineken in Holland/abroad... bweghh

 

[franciep10]

Same with Heineken in Holland/abroad... bweghh

I agree heineken is not that good, my favourite dutch beer is Grolsch premium pilsner very good. But if you want the best try this brand it's belgian De Gouden Boom.

 

[TRDean]

My favorite Dutch beer is Orangeboom!!! Jopi's Piano Bar in Arnhem is my favorite place to drink it. Although I don't know if it is there anymore. Good stuff.

 

[jaylew]

I agree heineken is not that good, my favourite dutch beer is Grolsch premium pilsner very good. But if you want the best try this brand it's belgian De Gouden Boom.

Ugh..imo the name is well chosen. Grolsch is just, well...grolsch!!

 

[BroDeal]

btw, Outback Steak House is owned by an American company....

I know, but everything I put in the list is "australian" in the eyes of americans. I don't even think the narrator of the Outback Steakhouse TV commercials is australian. His accent sounds a bit fake. I also have my doubts about their menu. Are bloomin onions really an australian delicacy. Maybe we need a reall aussie to eat at one of four or five Outback Steakhouses that are in Australia and give a review. That would be a riot.

 

[karlboss]

The difference between heineken in the netherlands and fosters in australia is its easy to find heineken in the netherlands and if by looking at the amount stocked in shops its is widely purchased. My local bottle shop doesn't stock fosters at all.

Why would we go to outback steakhouse when we can go to any pub? Why am i sitting at work when I could go to the pub? One of the great things about the tour in australia is late nights midweek can be spent watching in the pub.

Speaking of the tour, last 2 years every stage live on SBS (one of only 5 free to air stations), however this year its on SBS 2 a free but digital channel requiring me to ensure my favourite pub has upgraded to digital tv or I must. Did I just demonstrate how far behind the rest of the world we are?

and Hogan saying this is a bike, would surely pull out something made of steel which could double quite adequately as a weapon.

 

[V&K2009]

Vegemite-Hills

I've said it for years... Kraft Foods(Melbourne based) have loads of money and Hills Hoists (Adelaide based) are as aussie as it gets!!

VEGEMITE HILLS PROFESSIONAL CYCLING TEAM

What else could it be!

 

[Seth Bullock]

Was it really that bad? My wife wants me to watch it with her..

Yep, it's sh!thouse. Full of seppo bullsh!t...

An Australian team could be a real powerhouse - similar possibly to Colombia; that is team depth.

Evans, Rodgers, Lloyd, Gerrans, Cooke, Davis, Haussler (provided he renounces Deutschland), O'Grady, Hansen, Renshaw, Hayman, Sulzberger, Lowe to name a few. Then of course there's the young Jack Bobridge sensation. DS could as someone else said be McEwen, White, McGee etc.

 

[boalio]

I know, but everything I put in the list is "australian" in the eyes of americans. I don't even think the narrator of the Outback Steakhouse TV commercials is australian. His accent sounds a bit fake. I also have my doubts about their menu. Are bloomin onions really an australian delicacy. Maybe we need a reall aussie to eat at one of four or five Outback Steakhouses that are in Australia and give a review. That would be a riot.

Nope his accent is fake. I went to one and i was nearly crying laughing. I have never ever heard of a 'bloomin onion'. nobody in australia even says bloomin unless they are Alf Stewart or over 95.

The funniest was the buffalo wings called kookaburra wings! hahaa. that's disgusting. why would you think kookaburra wings would be appetising? it would be like eating crow wings!

 

[Advancedone]

I've said it for years... Kraft Foods(Melbourne based) have loads of money and Hills Hoists (Adelaide based) are as aussie as it gets!!

VEGEMITE HILLS PROFESSIONAL CYCLING TEAM

What else could it be!

Of course KRAFT is an American owned company. QANTAS is the obvious choice.

And WBT, I agree with what you said about Fosters, I think all Australians agree with you as well. That's why we send it overseas were the same sort of person that drinks that crap called Budweiser buys it!!

And that's PRETTY* much all I have to say.
*please see WBT other post regarding the use of the word pretty.

 

[Bala Verde]

I agree heineken is not that good, my favourite dutch beer is Grolsch premium pilsner very good. But if you want the best try this brand it's belgian De Gouden Boom.

Grolsch is very good, I'd admit to that. Alfa on the other hand, is also one of the 'bigger' brands that has a high drinkability factor...

The golden tree... hmm haven't heard of that before, gotta check it out.

You see people, forums are really good ways to widen your beerizon...

 

[PACONi]

This thread is a perfect example of why there isn't an aussie pro team. Even on a cycling forum where the idea turns up we end up talking about beers within 6 posts. People just aren't interested in an aussie bike team.

Besides Cascade/Boags we don't make a decent mass produced beer. If you want quality local beer you really need to go the micro-brewery option imo.

 

[Runitout]

This thread is a perfect example of why there isn't an aussie pro team. Even on a cycling forum where the idea turns up we end up talking about beers within 6 posts. People just aren't interested in an aussie bike team.

Besides Cascade/Boags we don't make a decent mass produced beer. If you want quality local beer you really need to go the micro-brewery option imo.

Coopers Sparkling
Cooper Pale
Coopers Dark
Coopers Vintage
Coopers Best Extra Stout

And I'm not even from SA. It's not just the Tasmanians who have a lock on quality mass produced beer. Little Creatures, James Squire etc are good mass produced beer. The James Squire Porter makes winter worthwhile.

back to topic: There's not enough TV coverage for an Aussie sponsored pro team to be worthwhile. Qantas is already sponsoring the national football team - no reason to sponsor cycling too.

Saw T Lowe's name mentioned earlier in the thread. What happened to him? Disappeared after TdG last year. Had a very disappointing Tour last year, then did a Keyser Soze. Dropped out after two stages of the Dauphine this year - coming just about last each time. Bloke has a serious engine so it's all a bit strange. Hope whatever ails him is sorted soon.

 

[PACONi]

Coopers Sparkling
Cooper Pale
Coopers Dark
Coopers Vintage
Coopers Best Extra Stout

And I'm not even from SA. It's not just the Tasmanians who have a lock on quality mass produced beer. Little Creatures, James Squire etc are good mass produced beer. The James Squire Porter makes winter worthwhile.

back to topic: There's not enough TV coverage for an Aussie sponsored pro team to be worthwhile. Qantas is already sponsoring the national football team - no reason to sponsor cycling too.

Saw T Lowe's name mentioned earlier in the thread. What happened to him? Disappeared after TdG last year. Had a very disappointing Tour last year, then did a Keyser Soze. Dropped out after two stages of the Dauphine this year - coming just about last each time. Bloke has a serious engine so it's all a bit strange. Hope whatever ails him is sorted soon.

I'll pay the Coopers Pale Ale, forgot about them. Not a fan of the Sparkling or heavier beers though. Winter = Red wines in my house.
Little Creatures (love the Pilsner) and James Squire, I consider to be closer to a micro, than say a CUB or Lion Nathan set up.

Good point on Lowe. He's been talked up for a while, but doesn't seem to have made any impression at all.

 

[42x16ss]

Team name: Crikey
Sponsor: Outback Steakhouse
Director Sportif. Paul Hogan
Podium Girl: Nicole Kidman
Team spokeman: Kirk Lazarus
Team car: Subaru Outback
Official recovery drink: Fosters beer
Motivational tool: Anyone who fails to win is strapped to a chair and forced to watch the movie Australia.

Ok guys, hear me out. My idea for an Aussie team...

DS: Warwick Capper
Podium Girl: The CHK CHK Boom Girl
Team Spokesman: Corey Worthington
Team Car: HSV Maloo
Official Recovery Drink: Bundy Rum
Motivational Tool: Some Drunk bogan driving an old SS Commodore ute with permission to run over everyone he catches - maybe NOW we'll see Cadel attack!

 

[El Imbatido]

Come on surely the government would sponsor the team. We already have a budget defecit of $57 billion whats 25 million a year on top of that. Shat all
And our prime minister Kevin 'fair shake of the sauce bottle mate' Rudd could be DS.

Note: To non-australians when the Prime minister was asked why there werent more women on his front bench in the government his reply was 'Fair shake of the sauce bottle mate"