Cycling Ettiquete - The Rules

[Fourier]

I have to confess that I use a saddle bag on my road bike.
I didn't use to but one day I crashed in the rain going around a tight corner. I had put my house keys in the side pocket of my jersey and as I scrapped along the asphalt on my side and back, the key dug in right where the pelvic bone is. It left a nasty bruise for weeks and totaled my jersey. It could have been much worse.
I since put all metal objects in the saddle bag, away from my tired bones.

 

[53 x 11]

Today I was banned from the Rules of the Euro Cyclist for being too dogmatic about the rules. (I insisted that even though Zabel has a thousand wins he is not exempt from any of the rule)

I must repeat:

No long knicks or short socks.

No black socks

No team kits unless in a team.

No Cervelos.

No sitting on my wheel while I'm trying to do a solo recovery ride.

No attempting to look like a bike messenger, only a solid meth habit will get you there.

Booties must be WHITE.

You must never complain about any equiptment which has been provided free from a sponsor unless it is long knicks or short black socks.

 

[craig1985]

Never mind, read the ****ing link.

 

[Black-Balled]

I be Hincapie would argue:
#45- 0 spacers on the stem is why his shiit broke in Roubaix.

 

[buckwheat]

Rule 5 is the only one that matters.

Subsection a, classification x)

don't tell me how badass(and 2 to 3mph faster, I mean 5kph faster) your Zipp 404's with Vittoria open whatever's pumped to 130psi are, compared to normal training wheels, and then whine about the route because the roads suck that way.

 

[barn yard]

No Cervelos.

probably the most important rule

 

[RedheadDane]

Okay... we have an entire team (probably more) breaking that rule...

 

[53 x 11]

Okay... we have an entire team (probably more) breaking that rule...

Please note my final rule:

You must never complain about any equipment which has been provided free from a sponsor unless it is long knicks or short black socks.

Cervelos are allowed if free. But dont even think about A)buying one or B) trying to tell me how good it is.

 

[RedheadDane]

I wouldn't... those bikes are far too expensive for me...
I have a bike! It's working fine... (admitted... It did start making some squeaky sounds in the winter... don't think it liked the snow... )

 

[Roland Rat]

No Cervelos.

Amen to that, brother!

Unless it's for sponsorship.

 

[Michielveedeebee]

Amen to that, brother!

Unless it's for sponsorship.

what's wrong with Cervelo?

 

[RedheadDane]

Good question...
I'm very... easy to satisfy when it comes to bikes! As long as it has two wheel, a saddle, a handlebar, pedals, brakes, gears and a frame I'm cool!

 

[maltiv]

what's wrong with Cervelo?

Awesome bikes, but they are quite expensive. Thus those who can't afford them are angry at those who can, I guess.

 

[barn yard]

have you ever heard the phrase 'all the gear and no idea'?

 

[richwagmn]

Cornering confidence generally increases with time and experience. This pattern continues until it falls sharply and suddenly.

Lol.

 

[frankdstrack]

Rules Modifications

Head on over to Velominati and post your suggested revisions; we'll be making some changes.

We'll also be announcing a new, fundamentalist sect based on Rule 5 and led by a particularly fanatic reader.

http://www.velominati.com/blog/the-rules/

 

[frankdstrack]

Cognescenti

Fundamentalist sect of Rule 5 loyalists: The Cognescenti.
http://www.velominati.com/blog/the-lexicon/#Cognescenti

 

[Steampunk]

Sweet! Now that's a jersey I would buy!