I mean nothing by the "noooo!" other than to give you props for beating me to one of my ideas. Though in fairness I have 2 or 3 on-the-go Vueltas, a couple of which could be just about postable in current format but need a little tweaking as well as there being two Vueltas ongoing, so let's not complicate things further.
Instead, let's go to my other well.
Nordic Series 9: Notschrei
The Nordic Series thus far has focused, with the exception of Candanchú, on venues in the Alps; France, Switzerland and Italy primarily. One of the benefits of Nordic skiing from a race design point of view is that it doesn't require the huge drops that downhill skiing requires - while there are Alpine World Cup rounds in Sweden and Finland, these tend to be restricted to the technical disciplines, and offer limited cycling parcours design options, whereas the Nordic venues offer more flexibility. And of course, there's more to cycling than the Grand Tours and the Alps.
That said, while I'm deviating from the template of the Alpine countries, I'm not deviating from the template of mountain locations - I will do in the near future, but a couple of issues recently have prevented me from going to a different well. So here, we're in one of the countries which is most fabled for its love of skiing, both Alpine and Nordic, but at a venue which is neither in the Alps nor the north. That's right, Germany - a land which is at the very forefront of biathlon, ski jumping and Nordic Combined, and that until recently was in a similar position in cross country, however has fallen away in recent times as its golden generation grew old together and retired before reasonable replacements could be found, as well as suffering a perennial problem that the popularity of biathlon in the country results in a constant stream of talents leaving the sport to pick up a rifle. And it's to a biathlon venue that we're going today, the Sparkassen Arena at Notschrei, in the Schwarzwald mountain chain.
Evocatively translating as "cry for help", this is a long-time resort for all kinds of skiing which has long been synonymous with wintersport throughout the Schwarzwald. Although significantly smaller than Germany's two Biathlon World Cup venues - Oberhof and Ruhpolding - Notschrei is a former IBU Cup (or European Cup as it was back then) host, although in recent years it has been usurped by Arber, in the Bayerischer Wald, and Altenberg, in Saxony, for international competition. The Nordic-Schule here remains very active, however, and among current internationals to call it their original home track Simon Schempp and Annika Knoll can be mentioned, while it also is in close proximity to the ski jumping facilities at Hinterzarten and the Nordic Combined World Cup venue at Schonach - both of which are smaller. The Sparkassen-Arena hosts an annual round of the Deutschlandpokal/Alpencup, has held national championships races such as those
here and the para-skiing World Cup, and is also in the process of tendering a revamp that would see it return to international competition. There's also plenty of room for parking at the pass which is just below the arena, with the Waldhotel am Notschrei, and so with the Nordic stadium itself alongside this space, logistically the venue could host races of any size up to the very biggest.
Sitting among the Schwarzwald mountains and atop a climb which can be approached from at least three sides, the options here are myriad and though the range does not include any nascent Galibiers or Zoncolans, it can still be plenty tough enough. Rather like the Vosges, there's only one borderline HC climb in the region - the 11km, 8% Kandel, but more of that later - but a large number of cat.1 and cat.2 climbs that can be chained together to make some interesting mountain stages nonetheless. The Germans have of course not been especially into their cycling of late and their calendar has become depleted but in the past Notschrei could have been included in the Regio-Tour; the Deutschlandtour is of course being reintroduced, but its scale in the first instance will not be sufficient to justify most of my stage suggestions - however the old version from the early 2000s would be ideal. But failing that, we are also close enough to the French border at the Alsace that it wouldn't be beyond the realms of possibility to see the Tour de France, or at least the lower level Tour d'Alsace, hop the border to arrive at Notschrei.
For the most part, traceur opportunities around Notschrei have been focused around the northern side of the climb, shown above, from Kirchzarten. This is mainly as it allows you to back it directly onto Kandel, offering that classic format so beloved of traceurs where the penultimate climb is the hardest. I'm no different, chaining the two together is too tempting not to explore, but it's also worth noting that junction at 4,5km from the line, after which the gradient is 7,7% to the line, and this enables you to link the climb to the Schauinsland climb, which has several different faces, including some very tough gradients, as you can descend through
this side of the Schauinsland climb, through the Hofsgrund downhill skiing facilities, until the junction marked for Notschrei on that profile. There's also the opportunity to, through a nodal road which links the summits, to go directly from Schauinsland to Notschrei, which puts the final summit around 5km from the line with a more or less downhill false flat until an uphill final 250m, or alternatively a more standard cat.2 ascent from Todtnau (
7,5km @ 6,4%) from the southeast, which brings a number of other climbs into the equation.
Proposal #1: Baden-Baden - Notschrei, 194km
Approaching Notschrei from the north, this is perhaps the "fully loaded" version of a stage featuring the classic traceur double of Kandel and Notschrei, moving down the spine of the mountain chain from the famous "so good they named it twice" spa town at its northwest corner. It is perhaps as strong a mountain stage as you could manage while travelling in this direction, taking care to use as much as possible of genuinely selective climbs rather than the multitude of 4% grinders that you can often find in the region, as we hop onto and off of the Schwarzwalder Höhenstrasse which runs along the peaks of the range.
Unterstmatt is a fairly underrated warm-up climb, which has a very steep, inconsistent and technical descent, while the other early-in-the-day climb is a traceur favourite,
Zuflucht aka Oppenauer Steige, a climb which, when you take the flat finish out, resembles Cobertoria west. Somewhat frustratingly it is rather difficult to connect to other climbs because of needing to ride along the Höhenstraße for a while to reach an opportunity to descend back into the valley, but here it is just a leg softener.
After this there are three lesser climbs but each including some steeper ramps, with the intent of making sure that riders' legs have plenty of suffering in them before we arrive at the main focal point of the stage, the miniature Alpe d'Huez that is Kandel.
Weighing in at just under 12km at 8%, this is a borderline HC climb which on this occasion crests at 35km from the line. The climb is fairly wide and there are few super-ramps, so it mightn't be an automatic "break the bunch to pieces" event, but the opportunities are there, especially as much of the remainder of the stage is a decent, broken up by 2km at 6% into Sankt-Peter. I have incentivized a move earlier on with the intermediate bonuses in Kirchzarten before the final climb, which is the full extent of the Notschrei profile above, officially 13,5km @ 5,4% but gradually ramping up until a final 6,1km @ 8,1%, so offering plenty of scope for selectivity.
Proposal #2: Waldshut-Tiengen - Notschrei, 141km
Long-time aficionados of the Race Design Thread will probably find this one fairly familiar - it bears a fair amount of resemblance to my queen stage from my Deutschlandtour, from Bad Säckingen to Feldberg, which used the same combination of the first four climbs before descending into Freiburg to do the Kandel-Notschrei-Feldberg trio to finish. Here, to finish in Notschrei but not repeat ourselves, however, we're cutting the stage somewhat short but bringing the steep Schauinsland climb close to the finish, so that final three climb back to back combo should be very dangerous since it's a shortish stage but there's essentially no flat whatsoever in the final third, which takes advantage of the fact that, while the Schwarzwald may lack in monolithically huge climbs, it does offer great opportunities for chaining climbs together.
This would be best suited to a clockwise Tour of Germany, albeit somewhere near the end of the race, where there are already GC gaps. It begins looping around the border with Switzerland before heading northward to the two-stepped cat.2 climb of Egerten, then doubling back on itself to the first major climb, the Tonale-alike
Kreuzweg. This has a long rolling descent, but after this it's relentless, with the solid
Hohtann climb (also known as Rollspitz), a decently consistent 7% climb above the Wiedener Eck, descending directly to the base of one of the shortest, but also the undisputed steepest, side to the Schauinsland climb.
We're only climbing this from the junction for Wiedener Eck (7,5km) to the crossing for Notschrei (1km) - so it's short, but that 3km at 11,7% in the middle help justify the cat.1 status, especially as it crests just 10km from the line, with the descent through Hofsgrund mentioned above before the final 4,5km ascent to the line. This should therefore see the key moves made on the Schauinsland climb, as the legs will have been softened enough, there's not enough time after Hohtann for many domestiques to return, and it's too steep to be a tempo climb, especially this close to the finish; even if a group stays together, there's then a fast descent and a final climb which is similar in stats to Ixua, so a pretty reasonable finish in and of itself.
Proposal #3: Offenburg - Notschrei, 211km
This is like the previous proposal but amped up somewhat, along with a potentially more interesting finale. Again it's a long loop around the southern Schwarzwald, starting to the northwest, skirting the western edges and foothills before entering in the south and looping back to the north.
Like the previous proposal, we enter the stage lightly, with a period of rolling terrain, but this stage is 50% longer and with three more categorized climbs, though admittedly the first one, Horben, won't really threaten anybody. The stage also features the northern side of Kreuzweg, separate from the eastern side that we descended in proposal one. This side is less consistent than the western side climbed in that stage (descended here), and is divided into two halves - the first part fairly gradual, the final 7km @ 7,5% as noted
here. This also backs into the
western side of Egerten which could debatably be cat.1 and probably would be were it closer to the finish.
Having hopefully trimmed the group a fair bit, we still have some way to go to the line, so to prevent a consolidation period where a lot of the riders dropped will chase back on, I've stuck the gradual ascent up to Sankt Antonipass, which forms a double summit not unlike La Mozqueta/La Colladiella or Agnès/Lers with the adjacent Weißenbachsattel, though the climbs are not as difficult as those double acts. Nevertheless the secondary summit breaks up the momentum of the descent, so it keeps the riders on their toes before a trickier version of the run-in. First, I've gone to Wiedener Eck rather than Hohtann, but rather than just being the lower summit, I've taken the narrow
Steinbühl road, which takes an otherwise consistent 4,5% climb and appends 2km @ 10% at the end, cresting 24km from the line. After the descent we return to the side of Schauinsland profiled above - however with a twist. Instead of going all the way to the Kreuz, we're going to the summit of Schauinsland, but that would entail a very short loop, or a very long route via Freiburg and the full Notschrei climb after a period in a valley road - not conducive to good racing. Instead, therefore, we leave that profile at Gießhübel (meaning 5,1km @ 9,5% - akin to Peña Cabarga or similar), cresting 11km from home, then after a brief hiatus, the last 3,7km of
this profile - 5% average - cresting at 5,2km before a slightly downhill false flat run-in. So while the opportunity to make it stick on the steep stuff is there, you then have a mad chase on the tempo climb AND the flattish run-in.
Ramp between Gießhübel and Stohren
Proposal #4: Balingen - Notschrei, 213km
The final proposal, approaching the Schwarzwald from the east, is the longest stage and also a slightly unusual medium mountain type stage which would probably be best served either as a very first mountain stage where its less threatening nature can make it a feeling-out process, or as a very last one where the fact that the final climbs aren't too hard means risks have to be taken, since here we arrive at Notschrei from Todtnau, which is a fairly unthreatening climb.
After rolling in from the Swabian countryside, the first real challenge of the day is Moosenmättle, from its least-known northern side. Cyclingcols doesn't have a profile for this side;
Quäl dich does - the first 4,2km is at almost 11% and it's
narrow and horrible. This does lead to a much more gradual climb which heads past the Nordic Combined venue at Schonach (future series spoiler?) - despite its small size, a fixture on the Nordic Combined calendar thanks to its heritage, as the home of ski jumper Hansjörg Jäkle and Nordic Combined athletes Hans-Peter Pohl and the Hettichs, Urban and Georg - despite the small size of the town and their prominence as sportsmen, they are unrelated - I cannot find any information on whether either of them are related to local biathlete Janina Hettich either, though
three sporting families of the same surname in the same town would seem unlikely.
Anyway, Schonach is partway up a very gradual climb of the kind we often find in German ranges - fairly simple gradients but seemingly relentless length to counter that. Perfect for tempo. Germany is weird like that - a combination of unbelievably steep goat track dead ends or very long, dull tempo climbs. Anyway, this leads us back into the known parts of the range with the HC climb of Kandel, however this time the summit is at 78km to go, even if it could be a finish in and of itself.
That's because this isn't intended to be the focal point this time but instead to separate the wheat from the chaff, as instead of the direct Sankt-Peter descent into the valley, we're taking the slight climb much further, to Sankt Märgen, to enter a different valley further up, enabling us to take on the Thurner climb, a
solid category 2 climb with some steeper ramps. This crests at 43km to go, leading into another potential future candidate for the series, Hinterzarten. Hinterzarten is host to over 100km of Loipe, and the Schwarzwald Ski Museum. It's a renowned ski jumping town, hosting the Women's World Cup and the Summer Grand Prix, but being most famous as the home of former Olympic team champion, World Champion and the first man to win all four hills of a Vierschanzentournee, Sven Hannawald.
This is with 35km to go, so we have a bit of respite before the final double-kick - the
easy side of Feldberg Pass before the Todtnau side of Notschrei. As neither of these climbs are especially difficult, if the race hasn't blown apart early on this is probably a sprint of the elites, but who's going to be there to control it if everybody's been split apart by Moosenmättle and Kandel?