section from today's Anne Gripper interview:

[the truth.]

.........Another development has been the ratification of WADA’s athlete biological passport guidelines. This means that the UCI now have concrete guidelines, rather than the draft versions they’ve been following since the passport programme’s birth in 2008. Part of these guidelines means the UCI must give a rider who returns an abnormal blood profile a set period of time to provide their account or explanation of the abnormal profile before a case is opened. Therefore, there will now be a time period in which the rider is aware that their profile is under scrutiny, without the knowledge of anyone else, including their team.

Please help me, for i read this as saying if your levels are abnormal- we will give you time to adjust them and change your pharmacist...............

What is the point of a warning?
Is red handed not the idea?

 

[Anonymous]

I have questions about the statement, too. But they've been so cautious about moving forward on anything legally that this might be another step in the right direction. Give somebody a month to submit a valid reason for the unusual values before starting any kind of legal proceeding against them. If you decide to go ahead, it makes it tougher for them to have an imaginative expert dream up something later on. It's almost like asking in advance, if you decide to fight this, what defense will you use? If it some how helps them move forward and keep people from racing due to their passport, instead of just targeting them and hoping they test positive for something, maybe it's a step ahead. So far in my mind the program has been a boondoggle. We'll see (maybe) if anything comes of their recent meeting.

 

[flicker]

Mad tv

I don't know but as they say He looks like a man.

Stopping doping. Who told you Anne the Greys'. (space people)

 

[Galic Ho]

That section speaks for itself. Daft. Any person whose literary skills have progressed passed primary school understand the intent, tone and content of this media release.

What concerned me more was Anne Gripper babbling about the AFLD and the UCI having lost faith in the French. Boring and very dangerous. Combine the two and what do you get? One body that wants to stop doping, another whose interests are best served by catching low profile riders and protecting the higher ranked riders.

Take this quote for example:

"But is the cheat simply more sophisticated? Are they using the data from the passport to manipulate or manage their results? "It’s much harder for them to manage their reticulocytes than the haemoglobin. So it would be hard to say that they’re manipulating that."

Who are they kidding? You cannot manipulate your reticulocytes at all. They are the new blood cells. Your body always makes them. Durrrgggghhh! They still tell you who has been blood doping. Riders percentage levels at the end of a grand tour should be near and over 1%. We have riders at 0.5%. Is everyone involved in cycling so naive and foolish that they believe people will buy this crap with some minor background knowledge on haematology.

Or this quote:

"We believe we have the confidence and the authority to conduct the testing on our own under the world anti-doping code. We have worked with the AFLD in the past but we don’t necessarily need their assistance. It’s a case of whether it’s worthwhile to us from a political point of view," said Gripper.

BS Anne. BS! Another slave to the system. An artificial body that has political, authoritative, and corporate vestige in cycling, whilst claiming authority to test athletes/sportsmen and women, whose performances are the foundation for the continuation and existence of the said body, is deluding its members and the public. In other words, without transparency and separation of powers the room for corruption and dishonesty supersedes actual authority. Clean your shop up UCI and stop selling us BS. Independent testers like the AFLD. Not the ruling body protecting its corporate interests (the money, the riders). Reminds me of that Copenhagen Climate Change PR crap. People are far too stupid these days.

 

[Hugh Januss]

Is it just my imagination or has Gripper gone in a fairly short time from being an anti-doping crusader (almost) to rigidly toeing the UCI company line? Somebody sure seems to have got to her.

 

[Big GMaC]

Is it just my imagination or has Gripper gone in a fairly short time from being an anti-doping crusader (almost) to rigidly toeing the UCI company line? Somebody sure seems to have got to her.

well i don't think she is blonde or bouncy enough for the uniballer to have used some persuasive powers...

 

[Ferminal]

I refused to read it, full of garbage "PR Talk" I'm sure.

 

[Oldman]

That section speaks for itself. Daft. Any person whose literary skills have progressed passed primary school understand the intent, tone and content of this media release.

What concerned me more was Anne Gripper babbling about the AFLD and the UCI having lost faith in the French. Boring and very dangerous. Combine the two and what do you get? One body that wants to stop doping, another whose interests are best served by catching low profile riders and protecting the higher ranked riders.

Take this quote for example:

"But is the cheat simply more sophisticated? Are they using the data from the passport to manipulate or manage their results? "It’s much harder for them to manage their reticulocytes than the haemoglobin. So it would be hard to say that they’re manipulating that."

Who are they kidding? You cannot manipulate your reticulocytes at all. They are the new blood cells. Your body always makes them. Durrrgggghhh! They still tell you who has been blood doping. Riders percentage levels at the end of a grand tour should be near and over 1%. We have riders at 0.5%. Is everyone involved in cycling so naive and foolish that they believe people will buy this crap with some minor background knowledge on haematology.

Or this quote:

"We believe we have the confidence and the authority to conduct the testing on our own under the world anti-doping code. We have worked with the AFLD in the past but we don’t necessarily need their assistance. It’s a case of whether it’s worthwhile to us from a political point of view," said Gripper.

BS Anne. BS! Another slave to the system. An artificial body that has political, authoritative, and corporate vestige in cycling, whilst claiming authority to test athletes/sportsmen and women, whose performances are the foundation for the continuation and existence of the said body, is deluding its members and the public. In other words, without transparency and separation of powers the room for corruption and dishonesty supersedes actual authority. Clean your shop up UCI and stop selling us BS. Independent testers like the AFLD. Not the ruling body protecting its corporate interests (the money, the riders). Reminds me of that Copenhagen Climate Change PR crap. People are far too stupid these days.

Kind of reminds you of another authority figure pronouncing: "Mission Accomplished".

 

[Dr. Maserati]

Hmmm, JV is not going to be happy because we criticize the Biological Passport.
So athletes are allowed explain why they have abnormal values - this may be a selection of the answers Anne receives:

I was dehydrated.
I was at altitude.
I live in a hypoxic tent.
I had a dose of the trot's.
My gynecologist said it was ok.
I have retired.
It was my twin - RIP.
Jack Daniels.
O/d'ed on Rice Cakes.
Jean Francois spiked it.
You missed the CERA?
Again?
I am dead.
I have more money than you - see you at CAS.
Excellent work -please accept this donation.
Why not catch real cheats - like prostitutes.
Thats the last time we are buying you coffee.
Call Hein.
But I was in Mexico?
I am still in Mexico.
Who is this?
Bitch.

 

[Hugh Januss]

Hmmm, JV is not going to be happy because we criticize the Biological Passport.
So athletes are allowed explain why they have abnormal values - this may be a selection of the answers Anne receives:

I was dehydrated.
I was at altitude.
I live in a hypoxic tent.
I had a dose of the trot's.
My gynecologist said it was ok.
I have retired.
It was my twin - RIP.
Jack Daniels.
O/d'ed on Rice Cakes.
Jean Francois spiked it.
You missed the CERA?
Again?
I am dead.
I have more money than you - see you at CAS.
Excellent work -please accept this donation.
Why not catch real cheats - like prostitutes.
Thats the last time we are buying you coffee.
Call Hein.
But I was in Mexico?
I am still in Mexico.
Who is this?
Bitch.

You made me spit Sierra Nevada Torpedo Extra IPA on my keyboard, ya bastid.

 

[the truth.]

Dr. Maserati. fantastic

has anyone compiled the list of real the ' i didnt do anything excuses. from Boonans initial someone in the night club must have "spiked my line of coke with some coke" to shu's "i didnt do it....... well i did ......but im going to race anyway"

 

[flyor64]

Hmmm, JV is not going to be happy because we criticize the Biological Passport.
So athletes are allowed explain why they have abnormal values - this may be a selection of the answers Anne receives:

I was dehydrated.
I was at altitude.
I live in a hypoxic tent.
I had a dose of the trot's.My gynecologist said it was ok.
I have retired.
It was my twin - RIP.
Jack Daniels.
O/d'ed on Rice Cakes.
Jean Francois spiked it.
You missed the CERA?
Again?
I am dead.
I have more money than you - see you at CAS.
Excellent work -please accept this donation.
Why not catch real cheats - like prostitutes.
Thats the last time we are buying you coffee.
Call Hein.
But I was in Mexico?
I am still in Mexico.
Who is this?
Bitch.

A real LOL, in my office no less, on that one. thanks!

 

[red_flanders]

I have to go with:

You missed the CERA?

 

[Beech Mtn]

Is it just my imagination or has Gripper gone in a fairly short time from being an anti-doping crusader (almost) to rigidly toeing the UCI company line? Somebody sure seems to have got to her.

+1 and not a good sign of the state of cycling. AFLD needs to be in charge of testing at the Tour next year, not UCI.

Hmmm, JV is not going to be happy because we criticize the Biological Passport.
So athletes are allowed explain why they have abnormal values - this may be a selection of the answers Anne receives:

I was dehydrated.
I was at altitude.
I live in a hypoxic tent.
I had a dose of the trot's.
My gynecologist said it was ok.
I have retired.
It was my twin - RIP.
Jack Daniels.
O/d'ed on Rice Cakes.
Jean Francois spiked it.
You missed the CERA?
Again?
I am dead.
I have more money than you - see you at CAS.
Excellent work -please accept this donation.
Why not catch real cheats - like prostitutes.
Thats the last time we are buying you coffee.
Call Hein.
But I was in Mexico?
I am still in Mexico.
Who is this?
Bitch.

Need to add DiLuca's "I must have been framed / there is a conspiracy against me" to that list.

 

[Digger]

Intended to dope but didn't dope. Basso
For our mechanic who is a diabetic - 160 syringes!!! USP
Stephen Roche - he had my blood for research purposes.
Gilberto and cocaine in the cake.
Tyler's twin.
Tyler's operation.
Tyler's test not being reliable, although it has been used in medicine successfully for years.
Marion Jones - flaxseed oil
Rumsas - for his mother.
Lance and his hypoxic tent.
Basso - DNA test not reliable.

 

[CentralCaliBike]

Hmmm, JV is not going to be happy because we criticize the Biological Passport.
So athletes are allowed explain why they have abnormal values - this may be a selection of the answers Anne receives:

I was dehydrated.
I was at altitude.
I live in a hypoxic tent.
I had a dose of the trot's.
My gynecologist said it was ok.
I have retired.
It was my twin - RIP.
Jack Daniels.
O/d'ed on Rice Cakes.
Jean Francois spiked it.
You missed the CERA?
Again?
I am dead.
I have more money than you - see you at CAS.
Excellent work -please accept this donation.
Why not catch real cheats - like prostitutes.
Thats the last time we are buying you coffee.
Call Hein.
But I was in Mexico?
I am still in Mexico.
Who is this?
Bitch.

You really should get some money from the late night shows - this is classic

 

[Alpe d'Huez]

That's hilarious, Doc!

Add Tyler's other excuse of "there's a lot of documentation people don't know about that hasn't been released" excuse.

Kind of reminds you of another authority figure pronouncing: "Mission Accomplished".

Funny thing is, it kind of was. We should have then declared victory, and pulled our troops out. (Sorry, this answer probably belongs in the cafe).

 

[Escarabajo]

Hmmm, JV is not going to be happy because we criticize the Biological Passport.
So athletes are allowed explain why they have abnormal values - this may be a selection of the answers Anne receives:

...

Good job Doc.

Add: "I am not that stupid, I know CERA is traceable"