The Big Fat Silly Honest Tour de France 2022 Q&A for Beginners

[BR2]

There are definitely a lot of good words here, but I'm surprised by the lack of Hodeg related content.

I don't know much about Cosnefroy's online activities, but I once (totally by accident, of course) watched David Gaudu play Farm Simulator, and that is time I'll never get back.

I am so empathic I thought others probably want to hear more about Pogacar than about Hodeg.

 

[RedheadDane]

What's up with that Colombian sprinter on the UAE team? 'Hodeg', or something like that? Why hasn't he raced in ages? And why does some commentators pronounce his name as 'Hodge'?
Officially, he got injured in a car crash in the beginning of the year. In reality BR2 probably kidnapped him! However, he has escaped, and it even appears he is scheduled for a few races coming up. Not the TdF, though. The UAE squad for the TdF will be 110% dedicated to Pogacar.
As for his name... well...

Alvaro Hodeg: From Monteria to Europe, via Medellin | Quick-Step Alpha Vinyl team (quickstep-alphavinylteam.com)

I promised to tell you a small secret. The secret is related to my name: H-O-D-G-E. Yes, you read it correct. About four years ago, I realized my name had been changed. Not my first name, Álvaro, but my surname, Hodge. Somehow and suddenly my identity papers said Hodeg and not Hodge, like it used to and like my family name is spelled.

 

[sir fly]

What's up with that Colombian sprinter on the UAE team? 'Hodeg', or something like that? Why hasn't he raced in ages? And why does some commentators pronounce his name as 'Hodge'?
Officially, he got injured in a car crash in the beginning of the year. In reality BR2 probably kidnapped him! However, he has escaped, and it even appears he is scheduled for a few races coming up. Not the TdF, though. The UAE squad for the TdF will be 110% dedicated to Pogacar.
As for his name... well...

Alvaro Hodeg: From Monteria to Europe, via Medellin | Quick-Step Alpha Vinyl team (quickstep-alphavinylteam.com)

Quite a character the great-grandfather of his.
...Columbus.

 

[RedheadDane]

Quite a character the great-grandfather of his.
...Columbus.

Naah, Columbus thought he'd ended up in India!

As for Hodgeg's great-grandfather; for some reason I kept thinking he came over in a literal rowboat...

 

[sir fly]

Naah, Columbus thought he'd ended up in India!

As for Hodgeg's great-grandfather; for some reason I kept thinking he came over in a literal rowboat...

Only swimming fits the story's bill.

 

[tobydawq]

Naah, Columbus thought he'd ended up in India!

As for Hodgeg's great-grandfather; for some reason I kept thinking he came over in a literal rowboat...

Now it's Hodgeg?

 

[RedheadDane]

Now it's Hodgeg?

That's just what I call him.

 

[tobydawq]

That's just what I call him.

Why not Ghgogdgggeggg?

 

[RedheadDane]

Why not Ghgogdgggeggg?

Because some people call him 'Hodeg', while others call him 'Hodge', so I just combine the two.
I don't wanna know what you call him...

 

[tobydawq]

Because some people call him 'Hodeg', while others call him 'Hodge', so I just combine the two.
I don't wanna know what you call him...

I just added a G or two.

I call him José Chagüi.

 

[RedheadDane]

I call him José Chagüi.

I was worried you called him 'Gogggggggeggggg, or something like that.

 

[RedheadDane]

Hey, BR, sorry for hijacking your thread...

What number does each rider wear?
Unlike most sports, riders don't have a number they wear all the time, instead it changes from races to race, so I can't really tell you. However, Pogacar will wear number 1 as the defending champion. The "main man" on each team usually gets the number ending in '1' (11, 21, 31, and so on)

How many riders are there on each team?
Eight riders. Used to be nine until a few years ago.

So, what happens if a rider has to drop out of the race? Can his team get a replacement?
No replacements! Some races have seen teams finish with just one rider.

 

[sir fly]

You should gang up with BlueRoads, Ginger.
Hijacks&kidnapping, RhD-BR Ltd.

 

[RedheadDane]

You should gang up with BlueRoads, Ginger.
Hijacks&kidnapping, RhD-BR Ltd.

I do not do kidnappings!
Otoh... if I'm the one kidnapning people, I can't get kidnapped myself... there is a potential here...

 

[sir fly]

I do not do kidnappings!
Otoh... if I'm the one kidnapning people, I can't get kidnapped myself... there is a potential here...

You'd be providing means for BR's activities.

And it seems I'd be managing the business.

 

[Samu Cuenca]

What is going on?
One wants to attack a country and its king, and the other wants to start kidnapping people.

I'm deeply sorry, @BR2. Your return seems to have brought out the worst in some people.

 

[sir fly]

What is going on?
One wants to attack a country and its king, and the other wants to start kidnapping people.

I'm deeply sorry, @BR2. Your return seems to have brought out the worst in some people.

Alright, dude, what do you want?
Who sent you here?

 

[Samu Cuenca]

Alright, dude, what do you want?
Who sent you here?

I don't know.
I don't know that either.

 

[sir fly]

I don't know.
I don't know that either.

Need a job?

 

[Samu Cuenca]

Need a job?

I'm not you're sure I dare to work for you.

 

[sir fly]

I'm not you're sure I dare to work for you.

I don't get ya, kid... am I supposed to make an offer?

 

[Samu Cuenca]

I don't get ya, kid... am I supposed to make an offer?

It sounded like you were interested in my services. I assume you need a Danish henchman for one of your schemes.

 

[RedheadDane]

I don't get ya, kid... am I supposed to make an offer?

An offer he can't refuse?

 

[sir fly]

It sounded like you were interested in my services. I assume you need a Danish henchman for one of your schemes.

Focus, pal!
It's you who needs something.

An offer he can't refuse?

That's right.
You'll speak to him and let me know what does he like... horses, carpets... anything.

 

[Samu Cuenca]

Roglič used to be a ski jumper?
Yes.

I'm not sure this needs to be included. I think even ski jumpers have heard about him these days.