- Jul 2, 2009
- 3,406
- 1
- 13,485
- Mar 16, 2009
- 19,482
- 2
- 0
- Jul 2, 2009
- 3,406
- 1
- 13,485
- Jul 2, 2009
- 3,406
- 1
- 13,485
- Mar 16, 2009
- 19,482
- 2
- 0
Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. They loaded up Jack's minivan and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. They pulled into a nearby farm house and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night.
"I realize it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed," she explained, "and I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house."
"Not to worry," Jack said, "we'll be happy to sleep in the barn, and if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light."
The lady agreed and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared and they got on their way and enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.
About nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he met on the ski weekend.
He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked: "Bob, do you remember that good- looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up north?"
"Yes, I do."
"Did you happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and fool around with her?"
"Yes," he said, a little embarrassed about being found out. "I have to admit that I did."
"And did you happen to use my name instead of telling her your name?"
Bob's face turned red and he said, "Yeah, sorry buddy, I'm afraid I did. Why do you ask?"
"No need to apologize, Bob. She just died and left me everything!"
"I realize it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed," she explained, "and I'm afraid the neighbors will talk if I let you stay in my house."
"Not to worry," Jack said, "we'll be happy to sleep in the barn, and if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light."
The lady agreed and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared and they got on their way and enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.
About nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he met on the ski weekend.
He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked: "Bob, do you remember that good- looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up north?"
"Yes, I do."
"Did you happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and fool around with her?"
"Yes," he said, a little embarrassed about being found out. "I have to admit that I did."
"And did you happen to use my name instead of telling her your name?"
Bob's face turned red and he said, "Yeah, sorry buddy, I'm afraid I did. Why do you ask?"
"No need to apologize, Bob. She just died and left me everything!"
Ty-pooh tea
Potty wildlife expert An Yanshi has bagged five tons of panda pooh to create a new type of tea.
Yanshi - seen here collecting a lorry load of the stuff from the Giant Panda breeding centre in Chengdu, Sichuan province, southern China - believes the rich fertilser will give his brew a unique aroma that will make it a connoisseurs' favourite.
College lecturer Yanshi explained: "Pandas have a very poor digestive system and only absorb about 30 per cent of everything they eat. That means their excrement is rich in fibres and nutrients."
Yanshi - seem here wearing a panda costume - plans to sell his most expensive blend for nearly £50,000 per kilo and aims to secure the Guinness World Record for the planet's priciest cuppa.
"It has a mature, nutty taste and a very distinctive aroma while it's brewing," he explained.
Potty wildlife expert An Yanshi has bagged five tons of panda pooh to create a new type of tea.
Yanshi - seen here collecting a lorry load of the stuff from the Giant Panda breeding centre in Chengdu, Sichuan province, southern China - believes the rich fertilser will give his brew a unique aroma that will make it a connoisseurs' favourite.
College lecturer Yanshi explained: "Pandas have a very poor digestive system and only absorb about 30 per cent of everything they eat. That means their excrement is rich in fibres and nutrients."
Yanshi - seem here wearing a panda costume - plans to sell his most expensive blend for nearly £50,000 per kilo and aims to secure the Guinness World Record for the planet's priciest cuppa.
"It has a mature, nutty taste and a very distinctive aroma while it's brewing," he explained.
David Hollis, the World Champion in 1999, 2000 and 2001, sets his sights high during last year's World Pea Shooting Championships.
Run in the summer
Prizes
3km race: Male and female winner = £200, 2nd = £50, 3rd = £25
1km race: Male and female winner = £100, 2nd = £50, 3rd = £25
fun run - person who makes the most effort & person who has most fun £25 each
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