I'd like to apologise for my behaviour yesterday. I understand that you (the Admins) don't actually want to do something this silly, but are forced by circumstances aka the British Government.
However this claim (that I alread, less politely, called out yesterday):
Is just factually wrong. Dunno why anyone would get into their heads that it's primarily to moderators or admin...
We know that DM's mainly go to administrators mainly because that's the key use case for them. There are not that many DM's by volume being sent, we can see it on the back end and it's the easiest way to guarantee compliance without making larger changes. There are more DM's sent here than other sites, so technically you're right, but it doesn't change things because even those numbers are a magnitude less than public posts and more DM's is not a reason to keep them unfortunately - quite the opposite.
It has also always been possible to see user DM's, but we do not use that functionality because it needs some setup, we could trust that users use it correctly and as such has never been considered or explored. That would have been another alternative where we scrape DM's to make sure there is no illegality to keep us in compliance, but I have serious qualms about setting anything like that up.
I want to add that we've been accidentally looped into DM's from people trying to find ways around this and if people keep that up we'll have no choice but to permanently ban accounts because it's out of our hands. There's no fighting the power here, because there is no real choice on our part - if you're in the UK and disagree with the legislation letting your local MP know is the best move you have.
We're honestly not doing this to cause pain. I personally don't care that people message one another, and I trust you - I do because I know the demographics of forums.
The problem is the legislation is so broad that it means we have to account for situations imagined by people who don't understand forums and if there is a chance of us being in breach of legislation then we would have to make even more significant changes. This change limits that.
The alternative is looking into other systems like age gating and that's restrictive for everyone. Until recently it looked like we would be fine, but the one thing adding risk for us was DM's and we looked at the actual uses on a daily basis and the numbers made it the best option.