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If you were doping how do you handle the media?

Jun 15, 2012
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As I've stated before, the only things that makes me sick about doping in cycling is the ridiculous way many of the riders bath in the lie. Ivan Basso says it was stretching that increased his TT. Armstrong relished the opportunity to lie "I just had cancer, why would I put something like that in my body?". Tyler Hamilton had a twin at birth...and on and on and on. This is the only thing that ****es me off when it comes to doping...i get the internal debate, risk/reward, and the fact there are huge amounts of money at stake if you so choose. All those things are reasonably forgiving to the average person...but the absolute relishing in the denial...ugh

I think my technique would be to ignore all questions regarding doping and basically state that I would not be taking any doping questions. The only interviews I would do would be with Sally Jenkins types. If I had to I might do something like Dennis Menchov and just stay off the radar...but with that strategy means missing out on endorsements etc. But basically a blend of Menchov.
 
I think I would use this approach.

'I say they're just ****ing ****ers. I cannot be doing with people like that.
'It justifies their own bone-idleness because they can't ever imagine applying themselves to do anything in their lives.
'It's easy for them to sit under a pseudonym on Twitter and write that sort of ****, rather than get off their arses in their own lives and apply themselves and work hard at something and achieve something.
'And that's ultimately it. ****s.'
 
Oct 20, 2012
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Dear Wiggo said:
Sincerely, if I was getting into pro cycling I'd have one of my sponsors be a really big media company. They can do movies and ads and PR and help "handle" other media for me.

Dear Wiggo.. you are a genius!! :D
 
Mar 13, 2009
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BroDeal said:
I think I would use this approach.

'I say they're just ****ing ****ers. I cannot be doing with people like that.
'It justifies their own bone-idleness because they can't ever imagine applying themselves to do anything in their lives.
'It's easy for them to sit under a pseudonym on Twitter and write that sort of ****, rather than get off their arses in their own lives and apply themselves and work hard at something and achieve something.
'And that's ultimately it. ****s.'
or just act like Jens Voigt.

I am about the only person who cant stand his charade
 
I would listen to Proximo:

Listen to me. Learn from me. I was not the best because I killed quickly. I was the best because the crowd loved me. Win the crowd and you will win your freedom(to dope).


Also I would grind my teeth down (or at least tell the media I did) with a snarl on my face. Put on some ear extensions and a du rag. Veer off the road and take out a fence post. Tell my legs to STFU. And win a TDF. A combination of these things would make me very popular and grant me sympathy and ensure only easy questions are asked.

Or hire an "image consultant."

Or just tell the truth.
 
Oct 20, 2012
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Fatclimber said:
[..]

Or just tell the truth.

Truth is not an option. ;) Dear Wiggo suggested the best option.. Having for sponsor a TV channel to make your public image. Everything else is just palliatives.
 
May 13, 2009
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I would make sure to first get cancer or an aneurysm in the brain or something. Then I could tell the world how I never would mess with my health. If the disease thing doesn't work out, maybe I could become an alcoholic and score some pity point that way.
 
Jan 20, 2013
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Well you could choose from a number of well known PR methods.

1. Do a moralistic spokesman thing like Chris Hoy AKA Mr Clean - that only a small number in the sport do doping - by the ones for whom the winner takes all.
2. Lie through the back of your teeth, until you get no protection, and then do a kiss and tell on the whole shooting match - the Hamilton way
3. Do a retirement "cri de coeur" speach in a timely fasion to coinside with Armstrong confession - the Miss Nicole Cooke method
4. Come clean then start an anti doping campaign to charm your way back into the sport - by David Millar
5. Make out that you are cleaner than clean shared by Wiggins and Armstrong
6. Pretend that you did the TDF in an era when no one doped - Greg Lemond
7. I got onset of Oesteoporosis because I never took drugs - Mr Chris Boardman
8. Come out early with your denial once Armstrong's denial is complete, stating that you do not wish your cycling career to be tarnished by drug cheats. Also stating that if you took drugs at the same time as lying about it to the World's media would in effect mean your are some kind of a psycopath (their words not mine) - shared by Hoy and Pendleton

The real and just method would simply be to keep your council, however none could be found to fit the role, save with the possible exception of Steven Roche or Sean Kelly?
 
Jan 30, 2011
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Maybe, to fight off the guilt, I would fight for a difference cause, because doing good helps offset the bad.

Kind of a carbon credits scheme justification.

So while I'm on the environmental theme, perhaps I'd make out that I'm all for the environment, kind of a green edge to my approach.

Too much good for a good cause.
 
May 26, 2010
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Dear Wiggo said:
Sincerely, if I was getting into pro cycling I'd have one of my sponsors be a really big media company. They can do movies and ads and PR and help "handle" other media for me.

It is funny that the team with the big media company are making a complete balls of the PR and media handling.

About the only thing they have done is 'win' over Gallagher in the Telegraph.
 
Oct 20, 2012
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Cobblestones said:
I would make sure to first get cancer or an aneurysm in the brain or something. Then I could tell the world how I never would mess with my health. If the disease thing doesn't work out, maybe I could become an alcoholic and score some pity point that way.

[off topic]Without kidding now and without want to be mean, I don't believe that LA had brain cancer at all, and I say that because I know people that had this disease and believe me non of them got out from a brain surgery unharmed. [/off topic- I apologize for any inconvenience]
 
alitogata said:
[off topic]Without kidding now and without want to be mean, I don't believe that LA had brain cancer at all, and I say that because I know people that had this disease and believe me non of them got out from a brain surgery unharmed. [/off topic- I apologize for any inconvenience]

Maybe one more Oprah show and we'll find out LA had brain cancer also
 
Oct 30, 2011
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The Hitch said:
Best way to handle the media if you are doping ?

Know your role, and shut your mouth.

And be a nice guy.

Just pretend you're deaf every time it gets mentioned, á la Sean Kelly.
 
May 13, 2009
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alitogata said:
[off topic]Without kidding now and without want to be mean, I don't believe that LA had brain cancer at all, and I say that because I know people that had this disease and believe me non of them got out from a brain surgery unharmed. [/off topic- I apologize for any inconvenience]

There's photos of him with a pretty nasty scar right in the middle of his shaven head. Sure there's photoshop and all, so who knows. Maybe he got really lucky with the surgery. Maybe he was changed by it, towards psychopathy for instance. Anyway, it wasn't strictly speaking brain cancer. It was testicular cancer which had metastasized into the brain. Maybe that made a difference from the cases you know.
 
Oct 20, 2012
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Cobblestones said:
There's photos of him with a pretty nasty scar right in the middle of his shaven head. Sure there's photoshop and all, so who knows. Maybe he got really lucky with the surgery. Maybe he was changed by it, towards psychopathy for instance. Anyway, it wasn't strictly speaking brain cancer. It was testicular cancer which had metastasized into the brain. Maybe that made a difference from the cases you know.

They say that he had three huge tumors the size of balls in his brain. People that survived from brains surgeries similar to this, and after the chemo or radio therapy had a million side effects and problems.. with their talking, moving, balance, vertigo, epilepsy.. whatever can imagine.. No it is very hard for me to believe, having meet such people that LA manage to get on his feet after one year or more and go back to the races ans win what he had win, doped or not..

Sorry for the of topic, if you like to continue about this send me a pm or open a new thread please. Is not nice to mess up this thread.. :)
 
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Dear Wiggo said:
Sincerely, if I was getting into pro cycling I'd have one of my sponsors be a really big media company. They can do movies and ads and PR and help "handle" other media for me.
a big media conglomerate to control the sky, eh?

Homer%2BContemplating.jpg


sounds better than having a meager post office title sponsor. and they kept the dirt hidden for 10 years.
 

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