Poll: what kind of disaster strikes Tom Dumoulin at the TT

[Red Rick]

Good question.

With a couple of friends, "to dumoulinate" has even become our common replacement of "to defecate" in everyday use.

Got du moulin

 

[Armchair Cyclist]

He enjoys far more favourable weather conditions than any other rider, with the wind changing direction to be at his back at every corner; every bit of machinery tuned perfectly, picks the perfect line around every bend and gauges his effort exactly on every incline; his sleep and nutrition work perfectly; he wins by a comfortable margin and is carried off into the sunset on a sedan chair attended by two dozen maidens serving him perfectly chilled champagne, before a snow-white dove descends from the clouds to bring him news that he has won the lottery.


But only after he points out his surname, and declares that he is not Dutch after all.

 

[Vino's Mum]

Wakes up, realises he’s fallen out of love with cycling again, doesn’t show up, and has a bit of a dance with a big dog instead...

 

[red_flanders]

Poor guy, there are some things in life you can never live down

I feel like he would have a good laugh at this thread though, seems like a good dude.

 

[Leinster]

What if he won't be unlucky at all? What if, in fact, he has a deal with the devil, who took all the possible misfortune from him and handed it to the other Dutch riders at the start? There have been three cases of Dutch bad luck now, I think that's it. Now watch Tom win his gold.

Unfortunately, the mystic fates have misread your post.

And Tom wins 3 cases of Dutch Gold.

 

[Izzyeviel]

Needs to stop for a speed poo again. Wins anyway

 

[Sciatic]

What if he won't be unlucky at all? What if, in fact, he has a deal with the devil, who took all the possible misfortune from him and handed it to the other Dutch riders at the start? There have been three cases of Dutch bad luck now, I think that's it. Now watch Tom win his gold.

But it’s the RaboBANK legacy: they have an entire vault full of misfortune!

 

[Leinster]

He enjoys far more favourable weather conditions than any other rider, with the wind changing direction to be at his back at every corner; every bit of machinery tuned perfectly, picks the perfect line around every bend and gauges his effort exactly on every incline; his sleep and nutrition work perfectly; he wins by a comfortable margin and is carried off into the sunset on a sedan chair attended by two dozen maidens serving him perfectly chilled champagne, before a snow-white dove descends from the clouds to bring him news that he has won the lottery.


But only after he points out his surname, and declares that he is not Dutch after all.

His name literally means "Of the (wind)mill."

 

[OldCranky]

I had to vote for 'rocks up on a kid's trike wearing a Ronald McDonald outfit' because it was from my post in the MvdP thread, but I'm still laughing at 'falls into a shaft left by some miners' Great poll.

 

[Carrick-On-Seine]

He's doing well catching his minuteman but it's one of the Quickstep guys and the driver parks the car in the middle of the road. Tom has to brake hard and loses out on a medal by two seconds.

solid ride for 4th place...just missing bronze by 0.01.....i know i lack
imagination!

Mark L

He's doing well catching his minuteman but it's one of the Quickstep guys who has a mechanical and the driver parks the car in the middle of the road. Tom has to brake hard and loses out on a medal by two seconds.

 

[Red Rick]

Wakes up, realises he’s fallen out of love with cycling again, doesn’t show up, and has a bit of a dance with a big dog instead...

Huge dog or manlet? Which is it?

 

[Dekker_Tifosi]

dutch coaches decide to last minute replace him with VDP because this TT does have a ramp that does not get removed

 

[shalgo]

The Pedro Delgado special: he mistakes his start time and shows up late.

 

[CyclistAbi]

Darn it was a trick question again. We all list the highly obvious and possible disasters to strike. Only to realise we now completely eliminated all the common causes and no disaster to strike at all.

 

[Leinster]

The Pedro Delgado special: he mistakes his start time and shows up late.

He could combine the Delgado and Dumoulin for a Stephen Roche.

 

[Carrick-On-Seine]

Or, he catches up with Thomas just before a speed bump and repeats the fate of Gesink.

 

[Armchair Cyclist]

His name literally means "Of the (wind)mill."

Yes, but not in Dutch.

 

[Gigs_98]

"Oh sh*t I thought it was Tokyo, Pennsylvania"

 

[Sciatic]

Got du moulin

Uh-oh, unfortunately I read that and my brain went to bloody stool = Moulin Rouge. Sorry!!

 

[Lequack]

How is "Has to take a dump in the middle of the race" not an option?

I still laugh at that moment. At the time I was watching it I didn't know he went for a poop, I just saw him starting to udnress, so to me it looked like he went feral, started taking off his clothes and just started walking back into nature.

 

[SHAD0W93]

Major Tom to pull a Spartacus by winning, dominating the opposition, and retiring. Dekker Tifosi to be MIA for a week celebrating.

 

[Ricco']

I still laugh at that moment. At the time I was watching it I didn't know he went for a poop, I just saw him starting to udnress, so to me it looked like he went feral, started taking off his clothes and just started walking back into nature.

The first thought of the portuguese commentators was that he was stung by a bee.

 

[Samu Cuenca]

The Pedro Delgado special: he mistakes his start time and shows up late.

Yes, they confuse him by first saying he's starting in 4'30 and then later saying it's 1'30.

 

[Big Doopie]

I want (and think) WvA to win

but if he doesn’t, I would totally love Dumo!! One of my very favorite riders. Such class.

 

[Leinster]

I still laugh at that moment. At the time I was watching it I didn't know he went for a poop, I just saw him starting to udnress, so to me it looked like he went feral, started taking off his clothes and just started walking back into nature.

The irony of this being that tomorrow, in the shadow of Mt Fuji, Tom is going to get off his bike, go feral, take off his clothes and start walking off into the wilderness, and everyone watching will think “oh, Dumoulin’s off for a potty break again.”