Re: Re:
An Italian Love Story
Mauro Vegni was at his lowest ebb. And that’s saying something when you remember the 2012 Giro.
That’s because the 2019 Giro d’Italia was an even worse affair.
It looked pretty, pretty, pretty good on paper. It was long, it had time trialling, and not just time trialling, but individual time trialling; plus it was mountainous, though in regards to the latter, not so much in the beginning.
And what little mountains there were in week one, were cancelled out to such an extent by the time trialling, that Rohan Dennis wore pink going into unlucky stage thirteen.
Australian Rohan Bloody Dennis.
Perhaps it was all Richie Porte’s fault. The more talented – though obviously forever far less successful – rider from down under had once again put all of his eggs in the Tour De France basket. The Giro had come and gone without incident, or accident. That would never happen with Richie around.
Mauro thought fondly of Simon Clarke as he often did, and smiled.
I mean after twelve stages even Victor Campenaerts was still in the top ten. Mauro sure wasn’t about to go out and buy a lottery ticket. However, he did thank God that Tony Martin could no longer time trial.
He knew that the 2012 Giro d’Italia was bad. But it was still better than 2011 Paris-Nice.
The same couldn’t be said for the 2019 edition.
Stage thirteen onwards was meant to provide guaranteed excitement, but the only excitement was the false hope that cyclists who had never finished in the top one-hundred of a grand tour before, now had the chance to finish in the top ten. Even riders who in most cases would chase the mountains jersey became ninja’s. Thomas De Gendt refused to enter into a single breakaway. For he was within seconds of a podium in Verona, and he remembered the past also.
Yes, we can always find new things to blame the 2012 Giro for.
Stage sixteen bought about some serious splits in the peloton obviously, but it was too little too late. With 95% of the peloton dropped on the Gavia, there were still dreams of a top ten – or at least a top twenty – overall finish, so there would be no Formigal of an autobus here. Hence those riders were too tired to bother with a breakaway on the ‘short’ stage seventeen, and stage eighteen; well, that was reserved for the sprinters.
None of whom had left the race for the aforementioned reasons.
And what of Thomas De Gendt’s general classification podium aspirations?
Well he attacked on the Manghen, in fact he was the only rider to attack on the Manghen. As many experts had warned, it was too far from the finish. We all also remembered just how much we love dawgs.
De Gendt’s sole solo attack wasn’t very exciting. For this edition of the Giro actually had some general classification strength. So the attack amounted to nothing.
And so by the time that we got to Verona Vegni had seen three weeks of very little really, and now witnessed some Sky rider in Pink, in a tribute to mean pacing. “At least it wasn’t Rohan Dennis,” he thought.
But the story of the 2019 Giro d’Italia didn’t end there. For the winner of the mountains jersey was none other than Louis Meintjes. With little breakaway action the mountains points had mostly gone to the general classification riders, and Louis – whilst never attacking himself, and being a poor time trialler wasn’t challenging for pink - was the most consistent climber of those. Or perhaps he was just the one with the best sense of humour. For nearing the top of the Manghen he finally poked his head out from the pack, just edging out Luke Rowe – who had set a fierce tempo that made one remember the 2009 Tourmalet – for the points for second place.
At least Thomas De Gendt had been good for something.
But that wasn’t enough to deny Louis of his crowning moment in Verona. And now the crowd chanted “Zomegnan! Zomegnan!” louder than they ever had before. Even the South Africans.
Mauro then hit the bottle, and he hit it hard. It must have been one of those really sticky ones, for he didn’t come out of this bender until the day of stage six of the Tour De France.
It was the day of the finish at Planche des Belles Filles. The climb that was first seen in that year to end all years, 2012.
And in 2019 Richie Porte won it. Richie Porte not only won, but he put over a minute into Chris Froome and Geraint Thomas. It wouldn’t matter later obviously, as he crashed out on stage nine, but now the fans were calling the Tour De France the race that is decided by minutes, whereas it was by seconds they said for the Giro.
The criticism continued to come thick and fast. When Vincenzo Nibali came out and said, that; “If Mauro Vegni is Ivan Basso in terms of exciting parcours style, then Christophe Prudhomme must be Marco Pantani”, that was the final straw.
Mauro Vegni now did what any other normal human being would do. He developed an infatuation with Planche des Belles Filles. Especially when he heard its translation. “The place of the beautiful girls.” And what hot blood – with maybe some frozen – cellared men would not travel great lengths for beautiful women?
“But we mustn’t go there Mauro,” his advisors told him. “Think of the transfers. And in the middle of week one; why, we won’t even be able to have a transfer.”
“Then we shall have as many actual stages act as transfers as is required,” Vegni declared, “no matter how many pancake flat stages it takes.”
Suggestions to return to Etna instead didn’t help. Vegni broke that down to Et-na. It was a stern no to that extra-terrestrial ugly, and an Italian yes to beauty, even if it was French.
And so a finish atop Planche des Belles Filles was set in stone for the 2020 Giro d’Italia.
And there would be time gaps. Proper week one time gaps. Vegni was in love.
But most love stories involve heartbreak, and this one is no exception.
PDBF was “the one”, Mauro was sure. It was a pure climb. But he discovered the harsh truth that faces many cycling fans, that it only achieved its peak via unnatural means. “Sterrato?! This beautiful climb once also finished with sterrato?! How could they do this to it?! Asphalt; Asfault indeed! It was fine, just the way it was. Everything is tainted now.”
That twenty-four percent section wasn’t real. So Vegni duly ended it all. Right there and then.
His time as a race director that is.
For lovers of the Giro and of grand tours in general all accept that there are flaws in everything, even in their favourites.
For without flaws there is no story.