Team Ineos (Formerly the Sky thread)

[Bernie's eyesore]

i'm a bit Confused, Bernie. Let me get this straight?

the UCI -

- faked a positive dope Test for Alberto in 2010, in order to ban him for the 2012 Tour...
- injured Andy Schleck...
- poisoned Cadel...
- took away Andy and Cadel's drugs, just in case...
- hid all the of Sky positives...
- faked sold out ticket sales for Box Hill and the Mall, months before the Tour, because they were failing to sell...
- designed a particular friendly parcours for the Tour to ensure Wiggins won...
- Oversaw and allowed a full sky doping program to allow them to win the Tour in "never before seen fashion"...

...In order to sell some tickets on Box Hill that nobody would have wanted but for the Tour win - tickets the prophets of which went to LOCOG, not IOC;
...And in order to get more British people to watch the Olympic road race and time trial on television because that increases IOC money payout to UCI, even though the mechanism allows for no such hing - presumably the UCI faked that mechanism, or bought off the other other feds to get the rules changed in their favour...

All I can say is, those fiends!!

I would be grateful though if someone could clarify the following, just for transparency sake -

Did the UCI use dirty photos of HTC HighRoad WAGS to force them to sell Cavendish to Sky - in order to sell tickets to Box hill that would never have sold otherwise?

Did the UCI put anything on Fabien Cancellara's wheels to make him crash in the road race? Inquiring swiss minds want to know...

How the UCI get the ticket money off LOCOG? Dirty pictures again?

And finally, just by the by, is it a coincidence that Bradley Wiggins won his first Olympic gold in 2004 and London got awarded the games a year later?

I think not.

The awesome influence of Pat and Hein's olympic friends! Frightening

I'll try to answer these one by one.

Did the UCI use dirty photos of HTC HighRoad WAGS to force them to sell Cavendish to Sky - in order to sell tickets to Box hill that would never have sold otherwise?

No, but it's no coincidence that HTC Highroad ceased exisiting at the end of 2011. The UCI obviously found a way to make this happen. Not sure on the details though, I need more time to make something up.

Did the UCI put anything on Fabien Cancellara's wheels to make him crash in the road race? Inquiring swiss minds want to know...

Rumour is that a man in fake beard and glasses was seen pouring oil on that bend earlier in the day. Apparently every rider was warned about it apart from Cancellara. Why do you think Tony Martin retired from the race? He wasn't going to risk going round that bend with the time trial in mind.

How the UCI get the ticket money off LOCOG? Dirty pictures again?

The same gentleman with fake beard and glasses was seen touting at the entrance to Box Hill earlier on that same day. Coincidence? I don't think so. Rumour is he took $400 million in cash for his tickets.

And finally, just by the by, is it a coincidence that Bradley Wiggins won his first Olympic gold in 2004 and London got awarded the games a year later?

You have answered that one already.

 

[Bernie's eyesore]

No the conspiracy started back in 1994 if not earlier. The UCI got the Tour organisation to run two stages in Britain to encourage 14 year old Bradley to dream of winning the Tour. The UCI went on to give a large bung to the National Trust so that Box Hill could be used. The Trust, which is well know for being even more devious than the UCI, knew it could also make money through Wiggins winning the Tour through increased sales of home made marmalade etc. There is no end to this conspiracy. Have I got the hang of this yet?

I bet Pat McQuaid has shares in that marmalade. Not only does his name begin with the same letter as everyone's favourite breakfast treat but it also rhymes. The conspiracy thickens! I'll be on the lookout for McQuaid's Marmalade on my next visit to Sainsbury's.

 

[martinvickers]

I'll try to answer these one by one.

Did the UCI use dirty photos of HTC HighRoad WAGS to force them to sell Cavendish to Sky - in order to sell tickets to Box hill that would never have sold otherwise?

No, but it's no coincidence that HTC Highroad ceased exisiting at the end of 2011. The UCI obviously found a way to make this happen. Not sure on the details though, I need more time to make something up.

I'm sure I saw some saucy Mrs Cav photos at some stage - are you sure UCI didn't do something there...he said hopefully

 

[martinvickers]

I bet Pat McQuaid has shares in that marmalade. Not only does his name begin with the same letter as everyone's favourite breakfast treat but it also rhymes. The conspiracy thickens! I'll be on the lookout for McQuaid's Marmalade on my next visit to Sainsbury's.

The same Sainsbury's that sponsored the Paralympics, including all that Paralympic cycling? Surely you jest....

is there no end to the mendacity?

 

[Hawkwood]

I bet Pat McQuaid has shares in that marmalade. Not only does his name begin with the same letter as everyone's favourite breakfast treat but it also rhymes. The conspiracy thickens! I'll be on the lookout for McQuaid's Marmalade on my next visit to Sainsbury's.

With added EPO, I go hooked on it back in the 70s. And note that Paddington Bear, he's clearly juiced up.

 

[Bernie's eyesore]

The same Sainsbury's that sponsored the Paralympics, including all that Paralympic cycling? Surely you jest....

is there no end to the mendacity?

The same paralympics where Phil Liggett, a known supporter of Lance Armstrong was commentating on the cycling for Channel 4? This is getting serious.

 

[Tinman]

OK. It's official. Cycling's Barmy Army has created so much crap noise that no-one is interested any longer in this thread. Well done Vickers, Eyesore, Hawkwood and others. Team Sky will be proud of you and you will receive your bonus soon. Soon there will no longer be a cycling news forum in fact, and you may receive your second installment. Congrats achieving your objectives.

Mods if you are in today maybe time to consider some action, or maybe time to close the shop soon. Not much value dialing in here much longer. Worse than the post season crit circus.

 

[JimmyFingers]

You can always tell by the Sky thread when the Australians are asleep

 

[Tinman]

You can always tell by the Sky thread when the Australians are asleep

Always the same boring songs by the Barmy Army. And I forgot you Fingers. You must have felt left out. Maybe not getting your bonus recognition.

 

[JimmyFingers]

Always the same boring songs by the Barmy Army. And I forgot you Fingers. You must have felt left out. Maybe not getting your bonus recognition.

You can't complain about what they're saying when you come at me like that and insinuate I'm on Sky's payroll. Or is it McQuaid I'm working for?

For the record I was merely making an observation over the shift in posting in the thread.

 

[RownhamHill]

OK. It's official. Cycling's Barmy Army has created so much crap noise that no-one is interested any longer in this thread. Well done Vickers, Eyesore, Hawkwood and others. Team Sky will be proud of you and you will receive your bonus soon. Soon there will no longer be a cycling news forum in fact, and you may receive your second installment. Congrats achieving your objectives.

Mods if you are in today maybe time to consider some action, or maybe time to close the shop soon. Not much value dialing in here much longer. Worse than the post season crit circus.

In the history of this thread, some of the highlights have included the suggestion that Sky caused the death of their own soigneur, who they were using as a guinea pig for the programme that they then implemented on Wiggins; we've had the suggestion that Chris Froome came second in the Tour, while riding at half pace and having to constantly check his power meter to make sure he kept his wattage within plausible limits; a fairly lengthy discussion of which side of Kilburn high-road Wiggins grew up in; the assertion that Wiggins is definitely working with Ferrari, but unfortunately the slam-dunk evidence of this, that one poster has seen is, ermm, secret; and now we've had the allegation that UCI were complicit in a plot to make Wiggins win the Tour, in order to sell tickets to an event that they weren't organising, didn't profit from, and was already sold out before the Tour.

I'm just interested, in your considered opinion, exactly why is today the day that this thread has become worse than the post-season crit circus, and will the Hog, Dear Wiggo, Dirty Works et al also be receiving a bonus from Sky for similar services rendered?

 

[Cycle Chic]

Always the same boring songs by the Barmy Army. And I forgot you Fingers. You must have felt left out. Maybe not getting your bonus recognition.

Good point - the Moderators let the threads become a circus...usually caused by the Sky sockpuppets....the mods are either lazy or it suits them to let the threads derail. The latter I think, because cycling is becoming a farce and that would mean less readers of Cycling News.

 

[Wallace and Gromit]

OK. It's official. Cycling's Barmy Army has created so much crap noise that no-one is interested any longer in this thread.

This thread has been full of crap noise for months. It's just all been one way. Now the crap noise coming from the anti-Sky faction has got so crap that it's given the pro-Sky faction some easy ammunition with which to return fire. Identifying one-handed riding as an indicator of doping is one thing. Making up conspiracies that are easily proven to be complete and utter b*llocks is something else.

And in the imortal words of Corporal Jones, "They don't like it up 'em Captain Mainwairing." The Germans didn't, and neither do the anti-Sky faction.

 

[roundabout]

Crap from one side is no excuse to post crap in return.

 

[JimmyFingers]

Crap from one side is no excuse to post crap in return.

It is however a general rule of thumb for internet forums

 

[martinvickers]

OK. It's official. Cycling's Barmy Army has created so much crap noise that no-one is interested any longer in this thread. Well done Vickers, Eyesore, Hawkwood and others. Team Sky will be proud of you and you will receive your bonus soon. Soon there will no longer be a cycling news forum in fact, and you may receive your second installment. Congrats achieving your objectives.

Mods if you are in today maybe time to consider some action, or maybe time to close the shop soon. Not much value dialing in here much longer. Worse than the post season crit circus.

But we need more evidence, Tinman, don't let the conspirators win!!!

Aaaggghhh!! Spliter!!!

 

[martinvickers]

Crap from one side is no excuse to post crap in return.

It is occasionally a useful corrective. and so much more fun than just trying to bring reason where it is clearly not wanted...

 

[martinvickers]

Good point - the Moderators let the threads become a circus...usually caused by the Sky sockpuppets....the mods are either lazy or it suits them to let the threads derail. The latter I think, because cycling is becoming a farce and that would mean less readers of Cycling News.

Dear God!!

The Cyclingnews Mods are in on this too?? Are the Mods Sky sockpuppets?? Or have Sky sockpuppets bought off the Mods?? With free tickets for Box Hill!! And a saucy photo of Cath Wiggins!! That's it!! The circle is nearly complete!!

We can't let this go, we're so close, so close to the truth....

 

[Hawkwood]

OK. It's official. Cycling's Barmy Army has created so much crap noise that no-one is interested any longer in this thread. Well done Vickers, Eyesore, Hawkwood and others. Team Sky will be proud of you and you will receive your bonus soon. Soon there will no longer be a cycling news forum in fact, and you may receive your second installment. Congrats achieving your objectives.

Mods if you are in today maybe time to consider some action, or maybe time to close the shop soon. Not much value dialing in here much longer. Worse than the post season crit circus.

Don't blame me, I walked in on some posts that were so crazy that naively I posted some evidence trying to disprove them. It was only after a number of posts that I realised the Sky thread had morphed into an Oozlum bird. As for Team Sky, I'm not like a football fan who follows teams, I have always followed individual riders namely Merckx, De Vlaeminck, Millar (Robert), Indurain, Ludo Dierckxsens, Cipollini, and Cavendish, only one of these has been in Sky.

 

[martinvickers]

This thread has been full of crap noise for months. It's just all been one way. Now the crap noise coming from the anti-Sky faction has got so crap that it's given the pro-Sky faction some easy ammunition with which to return fire. Identifying one-handed riding as an indicator of doping is one thing. Making up conspiracies that are easily proven to be complete and utter b*llocks is something else.

And in the imortal words of Corporal Jones, "They don't like it up 'em Captain Mainwairing." The Germans didn't, and neither do the anti-Sky faction.

Wallace, no!!

Don't you see : Tinman has been BOUGHT OFF!! Don't fall for it.

He's tryng to get the mod's to close the Sky thread. He wants to conceal the truth, just when we finally have the conspiracy almost fully discovered.

You owe it to cycling, no, you owe it humanity; don't let the Sky apologists win!!

 

[martinvickers]

Don't blame me, I walked in on some posts that were so crazy that naively I posted some evidence trying to disprove them. It was only after a number of posts that I realised the Sky thread had morphed into an Oozlum bird. As for Team Sky, I'm not like a football fan who follows teams, I have always followed individual riders namely Merckx, De Vlaeminck, Millar (Robert), Indurain, Ludo Dierckxsens, Cipollini, and Cavendish, only one of these has been in Sky.

Indurain sent Wiggins a cap, you know. With his autograph.

Just saying....tentacles everywhere...be on your guard...

 

[coinneach]

Don't blame me, I walked in on some posts that were so crazy that naively I posted some evidence trying to disprove them. It was only after a number of posts that I realised the Sky thread had morphed into an Oozlum bird. As for Team Sky, I'm not like a football fan who follows teams, I have always followed individual riders namely Merckx, De Vlaeminck, Millar (Robert), Indurain, Ludo Dierckxsens, Cipollini, and Cavendish, only one of these has been in Sky.

Ludo...is he the ex Begium champion who told testers he'd been taking stuff, but then passed the test anyway?
Being signed as DS for Sky so he can share his secrets??

 

[coinneach]

Don't let them close this thread down: we could get to 1,000 pages, 10,000 posts and 1,000,000 views before Christmas, with or without taking anything dodgy! What more proof do you need!!!

 

[Cycle Chic]

Indurain sent Wiggins a cap, you know. With his autograph.

Just saying....tentacles everywhere...be on your guard...

Martin Vickers - official T*sser

 

[Susan Westemeyer]

Good point - the Moderators let the threads become a circus...usually caused by the Sky sockpuppets....the mods are either lazy or it suits them to let the threads derail. The latter I think, because cycling is becoming a farce and that would mean less readers of Cycling News.

'Gosh, thanks for the compliments.....

Folks: REPORT PROBLEMS TO THE MODS. It is that simple.

And I am the only mod associated with CN in any respect outside of the forum, by the way.

I hope your theories about cycling are better groundd than your theories about the forum mods.

Susan