Official Lance Armstrong Thread: Part 3 (Post-Confession)

[blackcat]

I guess girlfriend Anna feels she is now Lance's wife or something:

"I'm Anna, we're the Armstrongs, my husband's Lance, he was just driving too fast around the corner or something."

yes. my new sig.

D-Q, do you like my new sig?

 

[Moose McKnuckles]

Would've only hit one car instead of two had he been clean.

Where's motoman when you need him?

 

[peloton]

The West End homeowner, who told police that it was relatives rental vehicles that were damaged, recounted that after the crash: A woman, well-dressed, 30ish, blond came running around the corner in her high heels in 6 inches of packed snow, which was pretty impressive she ran directly to us and said, 'We're so sorry, we came around the corner and slipped on the ice, and we hit your cars.

She said, I"m Anna, we're the Armstrongs, my husband's Lance, he was just driving too fast around the corner or something" the report says.

On Dec. 31, Hansen went to the Pitkin County Courthouse to be interviewed by Magnuson. Here, she allegedly acknowledged she hadn't been driving and that she had given her name and contact information to the homeowner.

Magnuson said he asked her who was driving.

Lance.

Lance who?

Armstrong.

I asked, "And Lance was driving the car when it crashed into those two other cars"?

Hansen allegedly said yes.

'I asked Hansen if Armstrong asked her to take the blame for the accident once they got home, Magnuson wrote. She replied, "No, that was a joint decision, and, um, you know we've had our family name smeared over every paper in the world in the last couple of years and honestly, I've got teenagers, I just wanted to protect my family because I thought, 'Gosh, Anna Hansen hit some cars, it's not going to show up in the papers, but Lance Armstrong hit some cars, it's going to be a national story."

Hansen, responding to another Magnuson inquiry, said Armstrong was not drunk when he drove home from the St. Regis.

'He was not intoxicated, and that was um, you know, I'm sorry I lied to you that morning but I was trying to make [it] sound like, well, I was driving because that was, just, I don't know ? I was just trying to make something up at that time.'

Why leave the scene then?
Classy

 

[blackcat]

Would've only hit one car instead of two had he been clean.

Where's motoman when you need him?

motoman, is now motowoman

 

[DirtyWorks]

The irony of "I wanted to protect my family" by allowing a drunk man to drive

Get out woman!

Aspen elite will plea out of trouble in the worst case.

 

[thehog]

motoman, is now motowoman

The New York Post reported:

A day after the accident Armstrong filed an insurance claim for his dented bumper with SCA Promotions for $7.2 million.

 

[D-Queued]

motoman, is now motowoman

Perfect!

Love the new sig.

BTW - Mercier was heard to say, "Why shouldn't Lance drink and drive? Other people do it. He's just trying to level the playing field."

Dave.

 

[jam pants]

You're missing out if you're not digging into the comments here:

http://newsfeed.gawker.com/confiden...ngs-girlfriend-leave-him-1683597629/+tcberman

Some Yellow Rose employees and Austin locals speaking to Armstrong's charm. And a fondness for coke.

 

[D-Queued]

You're missing out if you're not digging into the comments here:

http://newsfeed.gawker.com/confiden...ngs-girlfriend-leave-him-1683597629/+tcberman

Some Yellow Rose employees and Austin locals speaking to Armstrong's charm. And a fondness for coke.

Hilarious.

In comparison, even the 'haters' here must love the guy. We are way tooooo nice.

Dave.

 

[D-Queued]

I'm not sure, but it appears Lance's popularity might have taken a bit of a hit this time.

Lance Armstrong's latest incident shouldn't surprise anyone

Rather than re-quote all the choice bits, might as well just bookend the article by quoting the first and last sentences:

Once a cheater, always a cheater.
...
Lies. Always more lies.

The author does minimize the impact of a possible 90 days in jail. I dunno. Shouldn't that at least be worth a try?

Dave.

 

[thehog]

Good to see the Hog breaking the news early on

 

[ralphbert]

Hilarious.

In comparison, even the 'haters' here must love the guy. We are way tooooo nice.

Dave.

That is a truly excellent comments section. Outstanding really.

 

[D-Queued]

Good to see the Hog breaking the news early on

Good post hog.

Dave.

 

[Archibald]

That is a truly excellent comments section. Outstanding really.

with some absolute pearlers - "dickholery"

 

[D-Queued]

with some absolute pearlers - "dickholery"

You really have to wonder what happened to Public Strategies, as well as Tim Herman's quick lip service response to anything negative.

Are Lance's lawyers finally starting to distance themselves from the train, oops I mean car, wreck?

Dave.

 

[D-Queued]

This just in from Italy.

CONI has advised that one of the cars was about to give testimony against Ferrari.

Good thing Lance chased it down.

Dave.

 

[frenchfry]

In unrelated news, the US lawyers association has called for a national "Lance Armstrong day", citing his unrelenting generosity. "Lance is the gift that just keeps giving" stated the president of the association.

 

[coinneach]

This just in from Italy.

CONI has advised that one of the cars was about to give testimony against Ferrari.

Good thing Lance chased it down.

Dave.

Of all the funnies above, this

 

[jam pants]

Dave and ff bringing the humor. Great job!

 

[Alpe d'Huez]

Funny posts guys!

You're missing out if you're not digging into the comments here:

http://newsfeed.gawker.com/confiden...ngs-girlfriend-leave-him-1683597629/+tcberman.

Wow! What an awesome find. The article alone is just scathing, but those comments are something else! I started thinking about a few quotes I could grab and re-post here, but every single comment there seems to be it's own treasure trove! They make the Clinic look like a bunch of passive Pollyannas!

 

[thehog]

Good post hog.

Dave.

Crazy adaptive driving?

 

[rhubroma]

Funny posts guys!


Wow! What an awesome find. The article alone is just scathing, but those comments are something else! I started thinking about a few quotes I could grab and re-post here, but every single comment there seems to be it's own treasure trove! They make the Clinic look like a bunch of passive Pollyannas!

The intolerance to cycling and loathing all bike riders is so typical though.

 

[Benotti69]

Funny posts guys!


Wow! What an awesome find. The article alone is just scathing, but those comments are something else! I started thinking about a few quotes I could grab and re-post here, but every single comment there seems to be it's own treasure trove! They make the Clinic look like a bunch of passive Pollyannas!

ouch, Armstrong reading those comments aint gonna be a mellow Johnny.

 

[poupou]

He just shooted himself again. Maybe the end of his rehabilitation tour?

One thing that we can be sure that he got cancer because we trust Betsy.

 

[D-Queued]

Ok, its finally true.

Lance really does ride a Wrek.

Dave.